No Hope

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by LetItGo, Apr 30, 2007.

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  1. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    I cant pretend theres hope anymore, the last chance I had at some happiness, if for just for one day, will never happen now.

    Im too tired to fight any more. Its enough. Im so sorry everyone.

    Tonight will be the last night I live like this.

    I guess, when I look back on things, ive had an ok life, even though ive never known what its like to trully breathe.

    The people I love know who they are. Im not much for words these days, please take care of yourselves. Dont let the same thing happen to you, take action now before its too late.

    Please pass on a message of love to Blubs, no need to say much, she knows how I feel.

    Again, im sorry.

  2. Don't die Matt, please. Talk with me, please.
  3. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Matt!!!!!!! Stop It !!!!!!!
  4. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    There is always hope you just have to want to look for have to want to be happy. If you continuously think negatively on your life and think negative things will always happen than of course they will happen b/c you let them happen by thinking that way. As for that one day why will it never happen? Please do explain that to least give me that.

    You are too tired to fight, well why not instead of isolating yourself look to your friends who will help you fight, will help you carry on, will help you stand when you feel like crumbling. That's what we are here for..not just so you can listen to us we can listen and help you as well Matt. You look back on things and you've had an okay why not push and try to have an even better life. Again stop with all the negative thoughts that badthings will happen and maybe JUST maybe things will become more positive...maybe it's me just talkin out my ass who knows?
    The people I love know who they are. Im not much for words these days, please take care of yourselves. Dont let the same thing happen to you, take action now before its too late.

    I will not pass this on to blubs because you should talk to her should realize how many people love you and care about you..even blubs and even if it's not the way you want it to least she still loves you in some way. You need to realize you will hurt more people than you will help...ilove you dearly matt and i hope you get through this as i will be devastated if otherwise. Tkae care of yourself

  5. Insignificant

    Insignificant Account Closed

    hang tight matt and keep talking with us. i don't want you to leave my life permantly. straight up i wouldn't be able to handle another friend period. you are worth far more than this guy. hang tight and keep talking with us, please? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF MATT....PLEASE!!!!
  6. charlemaine

    charlemaine Member

    It's anger at things never getting better. I know.
    Getting rid of yourself is really like giving a huge "finger" to those who didn't/couldn't help you.

    Maybe you can give a thought to staying Curious about what might be around the bend.

    Nonetheless, it IS a big "F" You to those who know you.

    My own opinion but it is something to think about.
    I think these things.
    A lot!

    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 30, 2007
  7. LittleSparkles13

    LittleSparkles13 Well-Known Member

    If you ever need to talk, i'm here for you.

  8. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Matt I know you aren't wanting to feel like this and meaning to and living is such a struggle and you really do want to get better.It's so overwhelming I know about how everything just sweeps you over,you know how much we all care for you and each other.
  9. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    :( Still here, yes I am fucking useless

    The last 2 days have been the worst Ive had since forever :cry:

    From the extreme of wanting to die so damn much, taking the walk to that bridge to finally GET IT DONE!, being a fucking pussy and backing out. Then yesterday I withdrew a $1000 on c/card that I dont have, packed everything in a bag, and stashed it in the cupboard to leave this morning, 6 am. The bag is still there....and Im still here :( I have $8000 on that card, If I had a fucking passport id go and FUCK the consequences, whats more debt? Im already swimming in it, but I could never speak to my mother again after doing clean up after me...once again. Im such a pathetic fucking asshole.

    I need to escape, I need some massive changes to happen NOW.

    I told my psych she probably wont ever see me again, thats how it was looking, death or departure, I wouldnt tell her why which really pissed her off, probably only try and knock some sense into me, whats the point? or outright try to stop me.

    Dont know why im posting, its clear ive lost you all, only one person bothered to see how I was, and we both know who that is....the only friend I have left, and Ive probably ruined my friendship with her now as well. My fault, and Ill suffer the consequences. Doesnt matter, use to ppl moving on, guess ill go back to fighting my own battles.

    Good luck.
  10. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member

    That really upsets me matt..that one friend checked on you and that no one cares..bullshit. if you don't show up on MSN how od i contact can you sit there and say no one cares..that no one bothered to see how you were...i sat and posted ofr a half hour to this thread..i took my time and thought about what i wanted to say..but yeah..i don't care :mad: :mellow: :dry: :sad:
  11. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Yep miffed meself!!! Kept checking and asking if you'd been on everyone said no!!! So that remark is damned unfair:mad:
  12. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    :sad: sorry that was a fucking stupid thing to say, im a mess at the moment. know an offline msg on MSN, even though I probably wouldnt have seen it, if I had, might have helped...and at least 4 people have my mobile number, nobody called. Anyway its not the responsibility of you guys to chase around after me, I know everyone has there own issues to deal with.

    What I said was unfair, I know you guys care, I just sometimes feel like im in this alone, and I make it worse by isolating all the time, theres not a lot anyone can do about that accept me I guess.

    Again, im sorry.
  13. ~PinkElephants~

    ~PinkElephants~ Senior member


    i am truly sorry that youa re feeling this way ad so you know i did send you an msn message yesterday with a sad face asking if you wree okay..don't assume people don't care because their life isn't sitting in front of the computer waiting. I care but i also have me to worry about. i hope you are doing somewhat better

    take care
  14. ace

    ace Well-Known Member

    Remember Matty people do care about you matey it's just hard to see it I guess,when you're so low you feel so hopeless and worthless that's so apart of depression.Remember mate talk to me anytime of the day or night I left you my number.
  15. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    :hug: :hug: :hug: for me Matty
  16. LetItGo

    LetItGo Staff Alumni

    Im gonna use that number too Ace :) Just give me a couple days ya, but I will call you, be nice to chat to a local ;)
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