That's pretty much it....nothing left now to live for. Please do NOT feel sorry for my...I was not always such a great person...my intentions were always in the right place...but you know what they say about good intentions. How long must one pay for their past mistakes??? This is what is happening...I'm paying for my past. Every day I get out of bed and it just hits me within about 10 seconds - Dammit, I alive... I see no reason to not "end it". Really, there is nothing to end...I have no life anyway. ~If this triggers anybody, please just don't read it, but I've can't recall ever being this far down, and this is my last desperate cry for help, and then I'm making plans. Any help/advice/support is always appreciated greatly.