Hello everyone. My name is Chris, i'm 19 years old, and i have several problems that make me unhappy... i havent been happy since my mom died and i was 6 years old then... from then on it only got worse. Most of my family members are scum, they robbet me out of money left by my mother, im only left with one family member, severly ill, she cant walk she cant do anything by herself and i have to take care of her and i hate it, not that it's hard work it's just i hate it ... what is more im not sure if she a good person... theres a lot of things that's telling me shes also a greedy scum. Even more the so called "justice system" has a problem with me, when i tried to talk to police officers after this they screamed at me, made violent threats etc. I take drugs for almost two years with a short break for two moths, i also used to drink a lot of vodka but i dont drink any alcohol anymore. I did alreday tried suicide but i failed and i ended up in mental hospital... nothing improved when i was there, they didnt help me, they only made me distrust them, when i read what they wrote about me... i just dont wanna have anything to do with them anymore. Last thing is that i' very lonely... i don't know why, nobody wants to tell me whats wrong with me... i have several friends, good friends but they can't help me with any of my problems. All i want is to have quiet life, to have a girl that will love me and spend rest of my life with her. But now i'm almost certain thats impossible. Suicide seems really only way. But you people certainly have much more experience with that kind of problems... you surely know about it more than me, maybe you know the solution, maybe you even can help me. Sorry for writing so much and for my bad english.