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No One

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by Cortez, Dec 20, 2010.

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  1. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    The anger and loneliness is getting the best of me. The jealousy, the hate. The constant rejection by people. Day in day out I am ignored by everyone. I ask for help but people refuse to talk to me. I need to be alone, I wouldn't have a choice anyway. I constantly reach out to people and get rejected every time. Every fuckin day the sun shines, people smile, people love, people live, and I am mocked and mocked and mocked, it is too much. I am tired of being shunned. I am so hurt that I can't even speak, I can't concentrate, I can't think rationally.

    I don't know what it means to human, I wonder if I could be human. If i could be accepted, loved, spoken to, treated kindly, treated like a human being.

    I can't fake happiness, I can't fake humour, I can't fake intelligence, I can't even fake kindness. I am so bitter and angry. I have nothing but fear and anxiety in me.
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    This is so sad...wish I could do more than say I really do understand...there were times in my life, I tried so hard to push people away...I felt worthless and damaged which made me enraged...so sorry you are going through this...please continue to share with us...J
  3. Confused and Lost

    Confused and Lost Well-Known Member

    I know how you feel. I know myself that saying i understand is just annoying as you feel noone understands. But what you wrote is just exactly how i feel.
    I hope it gets better for you i really do.
  4. oval

    oval Well-Known Member

    you might as well get ready for a hug...ok here it comes :hug: :smile:
  5. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    You are a human being that deserves respect and to be treated kindly. Demand that from people do not accept less, and if thats what you get, those are not the types of human beings that you want to keep you company anyway.

    You dont have to fake anything, if you feel bad then you feel bad, hope the next day will be better but you are you and nobody else lives your life or pays your bills.

    Do you have any past friends that you can hook up with, with facebook and all that out there is there anyone you would want to look up?
  6. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    I don't have a FB, I am too much of a loser to have one.
  7. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    The alcohol is the only thing I can depend on, it never rejects me, laughs at me, ignores me. It keeps me company, in times like these. It is always here, it will never leave me.
  8. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    Thanks. I'm sure you do understand, thanks for the comment.
  9. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    ok, thank you sadeyes.
  10. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    If not having one means your a loser then I guess I will be a loser with you. I made one then started getting request and logged off, thinking that it would be easier to not have one then have one make friends then they get "to know" me and then loose interest.

    Thats why I come here and I chat with you guys, because in real life its just to hard to make friends and then when I do I have to be fake because noone could like the real me. Ive spent many years feeling this way, it F-in sucks real bad, lonely as hell and just brings me so down that I have just given up on making friends.

    Then I started coming here and another site talking to people that actually understand how I feel, wants to chat with me, asks me how Im doing. Even if its online I still feel wanted, if that makes since.

    So if you ever want to just chat, or vent Im usually on 9a-2p US time.

    Merry Christmas
  11. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    :) ok, thanks, you too.

    I didn't mean to make it sound like I think people who aren't on social networking sites are losers. It's just I always felt I wasn't "cool" enough to be on a social networking site, I never was on Myspace and don't plan on going on FB anytime soon. It's more of a self esteem issue with me than anything else.
  12. doityourself

    doityourself Well-Known Member

    Me to, I agree with you, I also think when your on FB or those types and dont get replys as fast as I like (Im very impatient) or at all it hurts to much. So why and take a chance on making one and getting my feelings hurt.

    Plus Im kinda boring, just trying to get through the everyday of life, dont do anything exciting to write about or talk about, so I think people get bored of me real quick.
  13. CheapEscape

    CheapEscape Active Member

    People are stupid.

    I know you're not a loser. I KNOW. I don't know what you're going through, everything in your life...but most people don't deserve your time anyway. They're not worth it if they don't appreciate you. And if you need to talk, then I, for one, am listening. I won't reject you.
  14. mulberrypie

    mulberrypie Well-Known Member

    You described my feelings to a tee. I doubt you remember me but we spoke on skype a couple times. I had a old user name that I forgot. Anyway, I wish I had something to offer but I can't even help myself. I hear you though, believe me, I do. Right now I am waiting the anxiety to subside so I get can my head together enough to devise a clear and efficacious way to end this once and for all.
  15. Cortez

    Cortez Banned Member

    Lemoncookie! :smile:
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