No title.

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Spearmint, May 18, 2008.

  1. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    I shouldn't drink. :laugh:
    It just makes everything that much more real.
    Everytime I close my eyes, I see him.
    Seeing him makes it real again.
    Makes me feel it.
    Hear it.
    See it.
    I don't want to remember it. :sad:
    I don't want to remember anything.
    I drink to forget, apparently I haven't had enough tonight to forget antyhing. It just made everything that much ore vivid.
    Made me want to self destruct that much more.
    And self destruct I will, because clearly, that's all I can do anyway.
    I should have gone to the ER yesterday, or the day before, or whnever the hell it was, but I didn't, because I'm an idiot.
    I just have so much I want to say, and I can't say any of it, and I don't know why. I don't know why I can't do anything right, or say the right thing, or whatever.
    I just don't konw.
  2. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    Drinking to forget. I've been there too. In the end it only makes things worse :sad:
    You can't talk/write about it, you say. How about writing it down and then burning it? Without other people reading it. Maybe that's a bit easier?
    Or how about writing everything in an email and then sending it to someone? That way you don't have the direct contact with them. Maybe that could make it a tad easier?

    I don't know, maybe I'm not being too helpful. Anyway, Jess, if you need to talk to someone, please do contact me. You know my number, email, MSN, Google etc.

    :hug: :hug: Wub tha Jess :hug: :hug:
  3. The_Discarded

    The_Discarded Staff Alumni

    I know how you feel :hug:

    You're heard hun, not ignored... even if no one's words are consolation :hug:

    Hang in there, chica, and hold tight. You've got a lot of good and strength in you yet.
  4. Lead Savior

    Lead Savior Well-Known Member

    Hugs gurl
  5. Spearmint

    Spearmint Well-Known Member

    :hug: Est, Rae, LS, thanks.