no title :/

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by lexi0, Jan 24, 2012.

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  1. lexi0

    lexi0 New Member

    hmmm here goes, i'm not one to usually talk about my problems i keep them all bottled inside. I don't want to talk to a shrink because that'd be wierd and i'd probably be commited into a "crazy home" i know that's not what there called but i'm being cliche here. Anywho i'm 17 im out of high school i graduated a year early, yay, i guess. I hated school so much i really had to get out of there early or i would of resorted to dropping out and no one in my family has a high school dimploma. I am lost now i have no idea what i want to do with my life. There is so much in this world to do but i am just one lonley person among billions in this world. I often blank out sometimes like im not even here. I don't know what to think about that. It feels like im losing myself each day, There are happy moments but i always have doubt on my mind. I am dissapointed by myself each day and i don't know why. I'm afraid to let life happen but yet this world is going to sh*t. I recently get into these depressed slumbers where im trembiling and just asking myself why don't you just kill yourself already? What is the purpose of being here? I'm stuck.. these thoughts may become an everything day now. And this is not something i'm proud of, of course i don't want to end my life, hell life is a gift. BUT i didn't ask to be here so why should i continue to stay. It really all comes down to the fact of my nieces & nephew. i love them with allllll my heart and never want them to know, if i did, committed suicide. Thats so heartbreaking and who will be there to protect them from this hell hole. I DON'T KNOW what to think anymore.. maybe you guys can help me because i feel no one really can.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi lexi0 You are 17 hun a difficult time still a teenager but becoming an adult that is scary enough i remember when i was 18 i did not want to be here either The thing is hun there is many things you can do You can volunteer at a pet shelter or in the community to help others you can join an activity you would love to do something that sparks your interest and will connect you with other people your age Art music sports join something okay reach out Your depression is because you are thinking way to deep hun you need to take each day and just enjoy it for now If you talk to your regular doctor then you can also perhaps get some help as well some support without anyone knowing hun it will be kept confidential hugs to you
  3. vapourdwarf

    vapourdwarf Active Member

    There is plenty out there and thinking back to when i left school many moons ago they tend to equip you with all the ammunition to pass exams and not enough for getting out there and making a life for yourself. i tried many jobs and most were dull until i stumbled into decorating which i held a passion for. This took about 4 years to find but as Total Eclipse mentions volunteering is a great way to try different jobs to see where you fit in and what you might enjoy. It's best to make these mistakes whilst still young. Then that is one part of life you have a direction for. Then maybe the rest will kind of fit together right or it will make things easier to decide. I left school with nothing and people told me i couldn't do anything with my life because i didn't have the certificates, but i found that it was just the begining i got on various training courses and managed at the time to make good of my situation.

    I wish you all the best and hope you find your direction.
  4. That one guy

    That one guy Member

    I think this might be easier to fix then you think.
    You say you still have a lot of happy moments, right? focus on them! with all your might, think about what makes those moments happy and think towards building new ones! perhaps your uncertainty stems from lack of veriety. Try new things. get out there! do stuff! maybe your not looking hard enough, or your looking to hard and over thinking it. some times stuff like this comes out of the blue when you never see it comeing. Just hang in there! do your best and if you truely believe hard enlough that you can find something, i can assure you you will. Take care and all the best

  5. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    You should talk to someone, they can help and they won't think you are crazy or send you away. All they will do is listen and give advice and try to help you. It's true that no one asked to be here, but we are here for a reason. There are always ways to make your life better. It may feel like you are stuck now, but you will find your way in life. So please don't give up.
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