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No way out but down

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Eleventyone, Jul 28, 2012.

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  1. Eleventyone

    Eleventyone Member

    Tonight was by far the worst for depressed episodes. It made me physically ill. There is no hope for me. No way to get help anymore, no one to turn to. It is too much for me to handle now... Please don't tell me I should go get help because that costs money, which I do not have. Even if I were to get it, it wouldn't work...it never has. I'm tired of being a burden to everyone and tired of feeling this way. I'm sure you've all heard this a thousand times, but I just wanted to get it out.

    It's kind of ironic that the sun is rising now.
  2. pppqp

    pppqp Well-Known Member

    hugs to you, Eleventyone

    does the sadness come out of nowhere or it's circumstances? these feelings of despair will eventually fade away. i'm well aware they will come back soon anyway. but i hope that you get stronger every time you are able to get through it.

    hold on please. it's hard but it's the best thing you could ever do to those who love you, and yourself.

  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    It is good you can let go of some of that pain here hun ok You are not alone so keep talking hun hugs
  4. Lps

    Lps Well-Known Member

    Hey Eleventy,

    There's no such thing as you being a burden. People are here to help each other. We're all here. So talk, that's the most important thing. Just speak. Let out the pressure in your throat and the weight on your chest.

    p.s. Hotlines are free, and you can call them and they gotta listen to ALL your shit, hahahah, you know what I mean? It's a great opportunity to say things out loud that you can't easily say to people who love you. And you can puke it all up. The weird thing is, there's no such thing as too late to make changes...until you're truly gone. Right up until that moment, you can make any change you want...and it totally changes the whole meaning of your life.
  5. Sea Sparkles

    Sea Sparkles Well-Known Member

    Finding something that motivates or detracts you from the thoughts, I realized is the key.

    When you feel this way, it's great to let it out in a rant. Get it out! Watching a good movie, sometimes helps too. These thoughts go away, and you will *regret* it later.

    Please keep safe
    - Sea
  6. WldHair

    WldHair Well-Known Member

    Well just keep talking to us because this is a great place to just let it out. You will go through this and you will feel the sun when it comes out. Life for me goes up and down and there are some times I feel the same way, just totally hopeless, but I just keep doing my thing and there are times when I feel happy and wonderful. Sadness feels awful, but all we can do is just embrace it and take its gifts. Maybe I'm crazy, but I've learned to appreciate the darkness in some ways. Hang in there!
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