I may have never been through a situation like yours, however, I can completely understand feeling hopeless. I myself have been feeling extremely hopeless, and a friend of mine just called my parents so they can take me to the hospital. It's not what I want, but it might be what I need, and I guess sometimes things need to be bad before they get better... I can't have everything I want right now, AND expect to feel all happy inside, I need to get better.
Anyways, sorry, I wasn't trying to hog attention or anything, I do have a point. My point is, that you shouldn't lose hope. I know it's hard to hold your head up and hang on, especially when you are feeling so helpless, but if social services can help you out for now, then maybe that is what you need.
Please don't end it... let's both get help together. You don't deserve to leave us, you deserve a good life, and it will come. Please keep holding on and stay safe.
Give social services a try one more time, I know it may not be ideal, but better times will come. And people will not look down on you for going to social services, if anything, they should look up to you for seeking help, it shows strength. Please don't give up!
Hang in there :hug: