Nobody Cares

[BlankSpace]

I know lots of people say that, but for me it's actually true.

I told my husband I'm feeling suicidal, that after another weekend of arguments I cried myself to sleep thinking of ways to kill myself, that I spend hours researching ways to die. And his response was "you're using your trump card again". My family don't care (something it has taken me years to come to terms with) and he was the only person I had left.

I fully opened up and his response told me everything I needed to know, people truly don't care and I have no place on this world any more.

 

[Freya]

I am so sorry that this happened to you. I know how it feels to be all alone (not since I have been here - lots of caring people here) and its one of those things that is so emotionally painful that it makes your whole body hurt. I am sorry he responded to you like this.

Do you want to tell us more about the arguments/what in your life is making you hurt so badly? I know sometimes when you feel so bad it feels impossible to start to make any changes but hard as it is, it can be done. You don't have to feel like this forever.

Please keep talking to us, and stay safe s*

 

[Walker]

Hi there.
Ouch! That's a really rough response from your husband huh? Sorry to hear he told you what he did, that really sucks.
Sometimes people run out of things to say and just act stupid instead. Men aren't known for being very sympathetic sometimes. If you've been telling him for many years that you feel this way he may not understand the differences in severity. It doesn't make it right. Have you sought any professional help?
We're glad to have you here. Everyone is happy to talk with you any time. See you around.

 

[Innocent Forever]

Welcome to SF

 

[BlankSpace]

Ultimately, the problem is that I'm just not a very good person. I spent many years thinking that I was a good person, that I was nice and meant well, but it was the people around me who weren't. I always thought I had some redeeming qualities but the sad truth of it is that I am not a nice person. My own mum doesn't like me, and my husband is fed up with the many years of my negativity and hard work on his side. I've had years of therapy which helped me to deal with my attachment issues with my Mum, but as the old saying goes: You really can't polish a turd.

I can't blame him really because almost all of our arguments end the same way: him angry and me crying. I am incredibly skilled at being selfish and ignoring other people and their emotions. In many ways, I'm still surprised I managed to find someone who was prepared to put up with my crap for so long. We have a 9 month old baby together so I've struggled with post natal depression too, and now he doesn't want any more children (at least, not with me) because of how difficult I've made it.

 

[Innocent Forever]

Ultimately, the problem is that I'm just not a very good person. I spent many years thinking that I was a good person, that I was nice and meant well, but it was the people around me who weren't. I always thought I had some redeeming qualities but the sad truth of it is that I am not a nice person. My own mum doesn't like me, and my husband is fed up with the many years of my negativity and hard work on his side. I've had years of therapy which helped me to deal with my attachment issues with my Mum, but as the old saying goes: You really can't polish a turd.

I can't blame him really because almost all of our arguments end the same way: him angry and me crying. I am incredibly skilled at being selfish and ignoring other people and their emotions. In many ways, I'm still surprised I managed to find someone who was prepared to put up with my crap for so long. We have a 9 month old baby together so I've struggled with post natal depression too, and now he doesn't want any more children (at least, not with me) because of how difficult I've made it.

Have you ever learned DBT? Because it would probably be really helpful.

Your actions don't define you or make you good/bad.

You are worth it and special just because you are you...