1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Normal relationship?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Lilyfrog, Feb 22, 2018.

  1. Lilyfrog

    Lilyfrog Well-Known Member

    Not really sure how to word all this,
    I am at a loss...My OH and I have been married 23 years, I cant say I don't love him but we now seem to just co-exist. I sometimes sit and think about life and our marriage, I know I wouldn't leave and wouldn't cheat.
    My wondering s are is it me that has caused us not to connect like we used to do? I tend to protect him from bad things and hold things back from him, I don't know why but I've always been that way with him.

    I cannot talk to him though about what Im going through as he has had a lot to deal with including cancer but I know he panics at the mention of mental health. I know this as he really didnt know how to handle our son when he went through a dip and recently when I needed to take our son to A+E for his own protection.

    Is all this:
    my head being mixed up? do I love him? am I just pushing him away to protect him from how bad I am really feeling? am I scared of him knowing?

    I really dont know what I feel...is this normal?
  2. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    Those are tough questions to answer. I'm not sure anyone can answer most of them for you. Possibly someone could help you in the process of answering them yourself though.

    It's probably healthier to be able to communicate honestly, but it also may be too hard for him, or for you.
  3. Striking

    Striking Well-Known Member

    Intimacy is difficult to build and perhaps impossible to maintain if you hide the truth from one another about who you are and what you feel. My question, why does he panic when confronted by mental health issues. If you know that then there may be a way to approach the subject with him.