not again....

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by John6491, Apr 6, 2007.

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  1. John6491

    John6491 Well-Known Member

    great im starting of trying to kill myself again... thinking of trying tonight once im all ready feeling like crap from the last one... fuck i hate life... all i do is just take up space and fail at everything that is thrown at me.... i need to die and stop wasting everyones time...
  2. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    It's Easter...a time for re-birth...Take that as a reason to start over and be a new are loved...
  3. gitana

    gitana SF Friend & Antiquitie's Friend Staff Alumni

    Hi, John6491!! I know it is very difficult and these feelings and thoughts tend to creep up on us..I know and understand feeling like crap from the last one.. Yep, have been there many times myself and still isn't easy when triggered and feeling down when something happens.. part of my life.. grew up feeling suicidal and self-destrucive.. I see you have been here a long time..

    May I ask and not sure if you know, it is okay, did something trigger tis feelilng to think about killing yourself?

    NO, don't believe that you are taking up space and fail at everything at all.. You are young.. You are NOT wasting anybody's tiime at all.. We are here for you and I am.. you can PM me anytime if you want.. Feel free to.. Okay? I know many people here really sincerely care and if not the case, believe me, I wouldn't be here today to tell you so.. I don't want anything to happen to you! I really care! Do you know why you are feeling this way?

    It has been awhile for me, although I fight this battle of giving into suicide.. some days it really seems the only option I have.. then I come here and can talk it out with people.. This last week.. out of nowhere, this feeling came over me so suddenly all week.. just do it.. I come here now first and I use to never have a concept at all in my life.. I have attempted many times and yeah, I understand feeling crapping after the last one.. Why do we do it? Somewhere deep inside, one may have horrendous pain, heart broken, etc.. You are young..and have a lot going for you.. can you explain more why you feel this way? I know these feelings all too well and I hope you will continue to hang on greatly and keep talking to us.. Okay? Please don't do anything to hurt yourself or suicide.. we all love you and care about you..

    I understand alot since I was 5 yrs old.. the devastation of sucide and many attempts.. oh, believe me.. shocked I am still here.. no way I should be and none of my organs were affected.. hospitalized several times but nobody else knew the other strong attempts I made and, it sounds maybe like I am wasn't serious enough.. can't go into methods here at all and won't.. believe me, I shouldn't be here today talking to you.. have been through much loss in my life, 9 to suicide.. family and close friends.. I understand.. I wouldn't be here otherwise.. What is the point you may ask? Well, I ask the same thing of myself? I hope you will keep hanging in there and talk to us more about what is happening in your life.. We are here for you always and my heart goes deeply out to you.. I know it is painful.. but talk to us.. Pm me if you would like to talk more.. OKay?? You are very special person and mean alot here.. You matter.. really you do.. even though you can't see it right now.. but you do.. I am serious.. I know.. keep sharing okay?? Please please, don't give in.. now.. fight it .. lean on us.. lean on me anytime.. okay.. I know it is difficult and extremely hard.. but I know with support and help, and people believing in you here.. and accepting you with non judgment.. accepting you for who you are.. and where you are at...

    I am glad that you could be honest and share with us some of how you are feeling.. You don't need to die.. give us a chance to help you.. it hits us really hard.. out of the blue, feeling like this..

    Just remember we are here for you always and really care.. We won't and I won't let you go that easily, so I hope you continue to keep in touch and talk to someone you trust or write me anytime.. okay??

    (((((((((((((((((((DEEP HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))


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