Not any better

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Briezy, Sep 26, 2016.

  1. Briezy

    Briezy Well-Known Member

    woke up today in tears. Just can't bear the pain and constant struggle. Where can I turn, no where good that's where. Told my mom and a couple of trusted adults and they all say that I should go to the hospital but that is not what I want to do. I don't want to be with the adults they scare me. I would be fish bait because I am the youngest. Someone give me something to live for because right now I don't see another way out.
     
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  2. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Hi Briezy, I can understand your fear about hospital, I'm just wondering if you could tell them your fears, would they maybe put you in pediatric. I don't know, but maybe phoning the hospital first and asking would be an idea. Also, you could ask if you could see a social worker, most hospitals have one on staff, they may be able to give you some guidance on what to do. I hope things get better for you.
    Brian
     
  3. Briezy

    Briezy Well-Known Member

    My fear is just being put with the adults since I am 18. Most adolescent units only have children up to 17 years old. I have been to the hospital numerous times before and know that it would help but being with the adults is the pet that keeps me from going. I am worried that I would be shark bait. I would be the youngest one there. Whenever I have seen the adults that are in the psych hospitals they always seem zonked out or completely out of it. I don't want that to happen. I really want it to help but also really don't want to be with the adults. It just scares me.
     
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  4. Rockclimbinggirl

    Rockclimbinggirl SF climber Staff Member Safety & Support

    It will be okay. When I was in the hospital, there was other young people there. I was worried too since I was much younger than some of the others there. Do not worry about others. Do what is best for you. Hugs.
     
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  5. lifetalkz

    lifetalkz Well-Known Member

    Briezy-I agree with the above post. You need to focus on yourself right now, don't worry about whoever else is in the hospital with you. I admit that there are usually more older people than young ones but I can't recall a time when I didn't see a few young adults, people closer to your age. Getting yourself past this point is all that matters. I suggest that you try hard to think only about your recovery now, what needs to happen to get to the next step and not worry about who else will be in the hospital with you. Good luck-LT
     
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  6. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    The reason I mentioned this was I worked in the emergency medical field for over 20yrs and out hospital would allow Pete over 18(depending on circumstances) to be admitted to the Pediatric unit.
     
  7. Briezy

    Briezy Well-Known Member

    Would the hospitals actually do that Brian? I mean I was always told that if I was to return they would have to put me on the adult units. I just have never heard of that.
     
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  8. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    I do t know about most hospitals, just the one I worked at and we did put adults(within reason) in paediatrics. I wasn't involved in the process, I was an ER RN, but it does happen. That's why I suggested calling them and giving them the reason you would like to stay in peds, it's worth a try. I think though if you express your fears they will put you somewhere safe, whether peds or adult.
     
  9. Briezy

    Briezy Well-Known Member

    I just want help and don't know how to get it. If I go in by myself then I will have the label of attention seeker. If I tell my preorder to take me the. I will have to deal with unbearable car ride to the hospital. If I call 911 who knows what will happen then. Do I just continue to struggle and deal on my own? Do I fight and stop the drowning? Or do I give up after a long battle and say "you tried your best." I don't want to go to the hospital I just want to give up and throw in the towel. I don't want to get better because in time I will be back in the same place that I am now. It is not worth all this work.
     
  10. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Briezy, I'd give getting help a shot, your still young and things can change. I've dealt with depression and anxiety all my life, but there been lots of good years when it was manageable. I know.......it's a lot of work. But at least there's hope. I saw too many effed up suicides in my job in ER, trust me, you don't wanna go there. Approx 90% of attempts fail and lots of them end up in a much worse condition.
    Brian
     
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  11. Briezy

    Briezy Well-Known Member

    Thanks. I see the psychiatrist tomorrow so we will see what she says. I think I am just going to go to sleep right now and worry and bout things tomorrow. Who knows it may even be a better day!
     
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  12. Brian777

    Brian777 Safety and Support Forum Pro SF Supporter

    Why not be open with your psych Doc. Tell her your main fears about the hospital, I'm sure when she understands what's bothering you she may be able to do something to help you. Take Care of yourself my friend, I know it's tough but you can get through this.
    Brian
     
  13. Deety

    Deety Well-Known Member

    Thinking of you Briezy, best wishes for tomorrow. In my city we don't have an inpatient paediatric psych ward, and teenagers from 16 and over are in the adult ward. However, there are two main areas, one for most people, and another smaller area for people who are more vulnerable for various reasons eg. teenagers or elderly people. It might be better than you think, I would expect the hospital will take care of you appropriately.
     
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  14. Briezy

    Briezy Well-Known Member

    Saw the psychiatrist yesterday and she just laughed at my worries about the hospital and decided that I would be better not going in... she changed my sleep aid medication to a long lasting one so hopefully I do not wake up in the middle of the night. Seemed to work last night. Maybe there is hope for my sleep after all. The. She also put me on aderall to try and give me more motivation and help me to get things done. Not really sure how that is going to help. I start the first dose today. Also the first psychiatric side effect that is listed for aderall is worsening or new bi polar episodes. That is just great because I am have it a pretty bad roller coaster episode right now with my bipolar disorder. Ugg hope if that things don't go too far down hill. Thanks for checking on me everyone.