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I couldn't decide whether to post here or the suicide forum bit but decided here, chose the more positive one i suppose...

I'm feeling really down at the moment and i just dont have the energy anymore to do anything. Everything is getting on top of me. I am supposed to be decidin what i am doing with my future (uni, college, job) etc and its just to much to think about. How can i even begin to think about maybe getting a job when i can barely get up in the morning?!

Also my boyfreind is moving in with me in a week and everything is moving so quickly. I'm tired and i just need to be on my own, i need to curl up and sleep forever.

My anxiety has got majorly worse this last week and i dont know how to cope with it. Its never been this bad. I feel like i am constantly being strangeled with the panic and i dont even no what i am anxious about!

My family is falling apart and no-one can hear me screaming for help. Everyone is so busy and there is no time for me.

To top it all i've started selfharming after 8 months of being stopped. :mad: I thought it would get easier after that long but every day just got harder and harder and harder and i'm a failure.

I just cant take all this pain anymore. I am sorry this is such a selfish rant about me. Thank you if you read it.
Firstly this isn't a selfish rant, everyone here is entitled to explain their emotional thoughts and feelings.

I think you maybe you do need some time to your self, to sort your head and thoughts out, but dont push your boyfriend away, he cares for you. Sit down with him and explain that you feel its moving to fast and that you need a bit of space to be by yourself, if he truely cares he will understand and will respect your decision.

And dont worry about planning your whole life right now, theres still time to plan, college, uni and job's. dont stress yourself out with it now, adding unessasary stress is just gonna make your feelings 10 times wrose.

As for the aniexty maybe try going to the doctor about it, and maybe for the cutting as well, doctors can help with aniexity, and its gonna take time for you to be able to control your cutting, maybe find another outlet for your frustration. Like going for a jog, ounching a pillow till your exauhsted or try writing. Many people find writing down their thoughts or a poem about how thier feeling very very very helpful, it makes you feel like you've told someone how you feel but without actually doing it, many members do this on the forums and have come up with some inspiring and beautiful.

hope this helped :smile:

take care

vikki x
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