I had the worst Birthday ever yesterday- I was okay yesterday morning until my mom totally pissed me off and then put me in a horrible mood pretty much the whole rest of my day after that yesterday. As if that wasn't bad enough- I had to clean up this huge mess of her's earlier- it was a major kitchen mess but yet it wasn't even in the kitchen- it was in the room off of the kitchen- the big table was a disaster with spices and shit all over it, all over the chair's also and well as the entire floor! I practically used an entire roll of paper towel's to clean up her shit and was down on my hands and knees cleaning it up on the floor. I swear XXXXXXXXX I don't know why I didn't. Then my mom comes downstair's later and asks me when I became OCD? WTF? and then also asking me- What is so bad about my life that I don't want to live it? All she does is piss me off- I told her that. I told her she has to piss me off on my Birthday too. I also told her to just leave me the fuck alone because I don't want to talk about it. I also told her she has to no say in keeping me alive nor does anyone else. All she can do is live her own life. I don't want to be saved. So I need to just keep my mouth shut. I was going to possibly wait til January to end my life but I guess I better do within the next 2 weeks or so.