I wish I could be proud of who I am. I wish there was something to be proud of. I've done so many stupid things. I'm a fuck up and an idiot who doesn't deserve anything from anyone. It would be easier on everyone if I died, all I bring people is pain. I wish I could cut the stupidity out of me. I have access to a gun and all I can think about is using it. I just want it to stop but it never does. I'm so angry and so tired of everything. I want to end it all, I'll never be happy so why should I bother to try. I hate everything about me, there's nothing good about me even though I try to be. I'm in the background and always will be. Anyone who thinks there's anything good in me soon finds out there isn't. I try to drink it away and cut it away but it never goes. I should be executed because I'll never be any good. I wish someone would kill me, if someone has to die let it be me instead of an innocent. I'm a waste of air and I need to stop being such a coward. People will only laugh when I die, I don't deserve anything else.