not knowing

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by mpang123, Nov 6, 2013.

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  1. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    Sometimesi feel the greatest peace is when i was uunconscious or being in a coma.
     
  2. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    As you can see, I'm in a funk again. My bipolar side switches from hypomania to severe depression. I hate these mood swings. However, I try to use my coping skills such as grounding and distractions, journaling, deep breathing, praying and anything I could do to keep me in the present so I won't dwell in the painful past and not be too overwhelmed with what may come in my future causing anxiety. I tell myself that I am safe because I don't have a suicide plan and not ready to think of one. I'm terrified from my last attempt. I just can't abuse my body like the way I did. I see how devastated my family would be and the shock to everybody who knows me. It's too tragic to leave everybody hanging. I'm trying to refocus by posting this right after my first posting above. I just wanted relief from the painful past by avoiding the reality of life.
     
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