Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Ima.robot, Sep 25, 2016.
Hi I'm not ok i'm tired of the same thing day in and day out.
What is stopping you from making your days different? What would you like to be doing instead of what you are doing now?
i always seem to implode when making steps forward, makes one hesitant
Maybe you need to just pick one step and focus on that first?
i tried to do the basics. it is sad to me how much effort it seems to take to just brush teeth twice a day an d workout and eat good food. Ijust am scared of this not changing like i am never going to be the person i once was
Hey Ima.Robot - Citizen Insane/Ken here! Just wanted to say that you're doing the right thing by writing this down right now. About your statement: "I am never going to be the person I once was" - It sounds like you're in a tough, tough time in your life right now, I would describe it as part of the grieving (stages) that you're moving through.
Grieving, mourning does involve reflecting on things that could have been - things like what you are describing. "I wish to be who I used to be and not feel like the way I do now." It's not easy accepting these feelings of what you are suffering from right now. It involves a lot of flexibility in thinking and adjusting where needed: "These feelings that I have right now are very frustrating and at times horrible to deal with, but they are feelings that I might have to live with for a longer time than expected." About adjusting, I want to say that you are doing the right things for sure, taking care of yourself - eating healthy, taking care of hygiene and even working out (which is something I neglect myself).
On some days where you feel this resistance - that you feel like you're fighting your own feelings and try to make changes in how you feel - it may be good to take a few steps back in how active you can be during the day. To give a personal example, I can not do fitness, read books and play the guitar (and cook meals, cleaning up etc) on the same day. If it feels heavy to do without there being an emotional reward, it's okay to do less than what you actually want to do on a day. We all have standards for ourselves, we also have an end goal in our sight - focusing on that can make things difficult. Let's say for the sake of it that the end goal is: "I want to feel better than I do now" - then I advice that one takes baby steps and not aim for the finale instantly.
Anyways, I went a bit off track, but that at least what I can say to you right now, thanks for talking Ima.Robot!