Not sure why I'm posting this... Frustrated!

I'm Sophie, one of Kazine's alters. I'm posting because I'm concerned about the direction our psychiatrist seems to be taking. Kazine was suffering what we firmly believe to be a manic or hypomanic episode from the beginning of April 'til a few weeks ago. Yet when she described her symptoms which were often very distressing for her, the psychiatric nurse just told her it was normal for people suffering depression to have these 2-month long extreme highs and tried to put her on fluoxetine.

Now that her elated mood seems to have subsided and she has returned to what she believes to be the only 'normal' period she has had in a LONG time (years) we are worried that when we next see the psychiatrist on Monday he will continue trying to put us on the antidepressants for no reason! Kazine doesn't even want to go into the actual appointment herself because every time she sees these people they tell her there's nothing wrong with her and send her away leaving her feeling disappointed since she went in there hoping she would actually get help for her severe symptoms (her depressions are catastrophic). So we thinking that Aaron would go into the appointment (I'm scared of stuff like that) but Aaron is very easily angered and he might yell at the psychiatrist and the mental health nurse if they still do not take her seriously.

The problem is though that now that she has a 'normal' mood they are even less likely to take her seriously or want to help her than when she was actually going through elated moods or depressions. We're also a little concerned that they are going to, as always, brush off the fact that we alters have appeared lately as 'normal'.

A few weeks ago the psychiatric nurse said he was 'not worried about her new symptoms' when she said that she was hearing voices (us) in her head and that they were trying to take hold of her and that she could see one of them (HIM) appearing in the shadows and scaring her. If they can say that isn't concerning we are worried about what they actually will take seriously - nothing, by the looks of it. Not that we particularly need help, it's not like we're causing her much trouble at the minute - the inevitable depression that lies ahead causes her more worry than anything. She actually doesn't mind us and in fact lets me come out and front half the time or more than half the time. She doesn't mind us at all. Yet we're still worried that everything is going to be belittled and said to be normal and we will never get any help.

What the hell do you have to do to get taken seriously? Aaron is going to have serious talk with the guy about the 'manias' mind, because a friend of ours has hypomanic episodes and is currently being treated for bipolar II and that friend says that Kazine's elated moods are worse than his. So there is no way in hell that they are normal and Aaron is going to ensure that they take this seriously. But I fear that the more we try to get taken seriously the more they try to push us away.

What to do?
Sophie xxx

 

Hi sophie im sorry kazine is not being taken seriously by the mental health docs and nurses in your area. It sounds like kazine is greatly in need of help for her manias and depression if/when it comes back. Maybe ask for a mood stabilizer? Why cant kazine go into the appointment instead of aaron? I understand she doesnt WANT to go but for her sake maybe she should and calmly explain her situation in dumbed down terms because doctors hate when you use those medical terms.

I wish all of you luck in your next appointment to get the help you need.

 

We've asked for a mood stabilizer and they won't give us it, they tell us that it's normal that it is not bipolar or a personality disorder and that she 'just' has depression but we know that this is not true, they just don't want to treat her.. The reason they wanted to put her on fluoxetine was in the hopes that it would act like a mood stabiliser but since when have you heard of an antidepressant being used to treat mania? Antidepressants trigger mania!!

She has tried so many times she has been trying since August last year to make them take her seriously and they won't listen so we're hoping maybe Aaron will be able to say it better than her. Kazine tends to be quite shy when she goes into appointments and she isn't very argumentative so she tends to just agree with whatever they say even if she does not agree. We think maybe Aaron will be more forward and be able to make them see that they are wrong!

I think you're right though, they do seem to hate it when you think you know what's wrong with you. But the annoying thing is she studies psychology and has done extensive personal research so she probably knows as much as they do about stuff like this! We hate acting dumb :laugh:

Thank you
Sophie xxx

 

Hi Kazine, your not believed because you tell everyone your what you have got and when your you are diagnosed different you refuse to believe it and then you act up and meet the symptoms.
Read back through your posts, i'm borderline then you posts show that, i'm now bi polar next day look i'm manic, now you have dissociative identity... If you don't agree with your psychiatrist you could change to another, these are quite serious disorders and i think a mental health professional would be able to recognize. Maybe you could try accepting they know more than you and take what help they offer, you might find it does make you feel better.

 

I disagree Decode. Her borderline symptoms were actually caused by me.
And she has been having elated moods for months every year for the past few years.

We know fine well that antidepressants do not make her feel better because she has tried them before. We also know that mental health workers are not all they are cracked up to be because it took her a year to actually get diagnosed with depression because she said she had depression, even though she was horribly suicidal.

So I suggest you do not say things like that to me when you don't know the facts, thanksbye.

Sophie.

 

I totally agree. Kazine what happened to being bi-polar, depressed, schizophrenic and BPD?

 

Oh is she now?

I wonder what you get out of belittling other peoples problems huh? Nothing else better to do with your time? A 27 year old that is so bored they come on a forum and analyse the posts of someone else and tell them what they're going through isn't real. Yeah clearly you have such a great life.

And I don't believe she ever suspected schizophrenia. So clearly you've been reading her posts REAAAAAAAAAALLY fucking carefully in order to come in here and pretend you know her? Yeaaah get away. Find something better to do with your time.

I believe that if you'd actually read the thread it was primarily actually ABOUT the suspected 'bipolar' and depression, and I reinstated that she was not worried about us at all.

This is supposed to be a support forum. If you're not gonna support, GTFO! :]

 

This is Kazine. Firstly I just want to say I'd rather you didn't antagonise Sophie... It's easy to do and she is very unstable and if she is upset, well, I kind of have to deal with the backlash.

Secondly, I think it is unfair that you're insinuating that I'm faking this. Just because I suspect I have bipolar, and used to suspect that I had BPD before I discovered that I had alters causing my symptoms, doesn't mean that I'm constantly chopping and changing my mind about which disorder I supposedly have. I'm not even convinced myself that I have DID, in fact I've been half suspecting from the start that my unconscious mind is making it up. However the fact I was hospitalised in the early onset of it (the severe twitching it gave me led to my friends thinking I was having a seizure and calling an ambulance - surely if I was faking it I wouldn't go that far? Unless you really think I'm a sick person.)

So yes, please do not accuse me of lying or faking because that is the last thing I'm doing. (If I was faking don't you think I'd have picked a better time to do it than last month, when I had final exams that dictated whether or not I got into university? I thought so too). The closest thing I would agree with was you saying that I was desperately trying to find a label to fit and justify my suffering... That's probably true. But please do not insinuate that what I am going through is not real... It most definitely is.

 

I'd like have a say in this actually.

I'm rather annoyed at you decode and angerfist. You seem to forget that this is a support forum. Now, it may look like she's "got a new disorder every week" however, you should see some links here.

DID can quite easily be misdiagnosed as BPD, because the alters can cause serious changes. This is also the same with bipolar disorder, the alters can have the same kind of effect. Though, angerfist, I'd like to ask where the hell did you manage to pick out schizophrenia from? You obviously haven't been looking over Kaz's posts very well. But anyway, even so, schizophrenia is similar to DID (hearing things, and seeing things).

Now I know Kaz in real life, and I see a lot of her. I have witnessed her alters and how much she actually changes. With Sophie, her voice changes, her entire person changes, Sophie is 100 times more flirtatious than Kaz is, and more confident. She is also often out for about a day, and I'm sorry, but if Kaz is faking that she has to be a great god damn actor, because pulling that off for an entire day, without slipping up would be fucking hard. Also, during the first weeks of the twitching and the dissociating, she experienced symptoms that I also experienced with my DID, that she did not even know about, so how she knew about those symptoms and pulled them off so perfectly would be beyond me if she were faking it.

Now, onto the bipolar thing.
I'm the aforementioned friend who is being treated for bipolar II, and I witnessed a serious mood change. I met Kaz when she was in the middle of her last extremely severe depression, and when I saw her mood change, it was rather a shock to me. To me, it was a definite mania, she was experiencing my symptoms worse than I do. Elated moods (which really did distress her at times), never ending energy, she struggled at times to even speak in a smooth flowing way, and I could hardly keep up with her. It was amazing. The period of time it lasted was longer than my last mania too, and no matter what she did, that was how she was. Elated and energetic.

I say to you two, don't judge her, or call her a faker unless you witness it in real life. There is clearly something wrong with her. I disagree with the whole self diagnosis thing, but DID, when they can switch out and are out for a whole day is pretty obvious in my opinion. Just, don't judge her unless you know her personally yeah?

Thanks.

 

Agree with everything Matt says. Seems pretty ridiculous to call troll on someone who just happens to be one of the only people on the forum who has an IRL friend here to state that she isn't faking . Unless he's gonig to suggest that my entire life is a lie too... I'm faking this to everyone I know and deliberately sagotaging my relationship and friendships!

Just clarifying that I have added Angerfist to my ignore list... So if he is reading this, just informing him that it is pointless of him to reply further... The last thing I need is people telling me I'm faking something that is having a drastic impact on my life.

Kaz

 

Before getting misdiagnosed, dont you actually need to be diagnosed with something in the first place? I stand by what i say and if that doesnt sit well with people then thats not my fault. Matt you even said in the last sentence that you diagree with the whole self diagnosis thing so that makes your entire post null and void because my entire point is self diagnosis. I never said she was a troll i said she was acting like one which is a huge difference. To someone who actually has bi-polar disorder, people who claim to then swap and change to fit whatever they have just read, its why we dont get believed when we go to the doctor or whoever.

Im not really bothered either whether you put me on your ignore list either, but to sit their and say just because someone you know IRL has witnessed symptoms doesnt mean anything. If that was the case then kirsty will tell you im a sociopath, psychopath, schizphrenic etc.

 

Well first of all, you say just because someone witnesses symptoms in real lifedoesn't mean anything, witnessing them over the internet means less. You can't judge her over the internet, whatsoever. She did not claim to have bipolar disorder either, if you cared to listen to her at times, you would know that it was others on this forum being completely adamant that she had bipolar disorder. It took that person in question a very long time to even slightly convince her that she MAY have bipolar disorder, she questioned the entire thing throughout.

My issue now however, is the DID thing. First of all, she was telling me things about me that I experienced, and I did not tell her about those symptoms until she raised the points with me. Explain to me this: How can someone intricately describe EVERY SINGLE FUCKING SYMPTOM I HAVE without knowing I've had them?

Also, she has not changed her mind about bipolar disorder. She's still reasonably sure she has it, and personally, as someone who suffers from it, I would actually agree and say that it is very likely she's suffering it. And in fact, I'm moreso sure about it than she is.

Also, you say, "Before getting misdiagnosed, don't* you actually need to be diagnosed with something in the first place?" if you cared to fucking read her posts (which you clearly haven't because you mentioned something about Schizophrenia*) you would know that she has been diagnosed with depression, and was given anti-depressants that did not work, which actually is a tell tale sign of either TRD or bipolar disorder (and hold on! She gets extremely elated for MONTHS AT A TIME) sounds like bipolar to me, or something rather similar. I must also add, that on speaking to Sophie who you are oh so adamant is fake even though you've never met her, had to deal with her, had to learn to freaking understand her (unlike me...) she suffers anxiety, which I've noticed so many a time, which GUESS WHAT?! Kaz was diagnosed with anxiety OMG HAHAHAHAHAHAHA what a fucking coincidence...

Tell ya what, let's leave it at this, and you keep out of her and my business, because the fact you're arguing that she's a fake/ troll/ whatever the fuck you say, is just stupidity, this is a support forum, don't fucking upset this girl further.

Kthxbai.

 

Ok if i was bored enough i would go and pull as many posts as i could to prove my point but ya know what, whatever dude. You think what you want to