I keep having the words of my mother in the back of my head, suck it up and get on with it. I have tried to do that my whole life, I can't seem to do that and that makes me feel like more of a failure than I already am. I have wasted 25 yrs of my life. And I'm alone witha very hurtful mother, a dead alcoholic father, no friends, no money, no husband, no children and no self worth. I am a good, honest, hard working, loving person who just wants a to be loved and I want a dog.