note has been done and im ready to go

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by klampner1961, Nov 2, 2009.

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  1. klampner1961

    klampner1961 Member

    this struggle has been going on for years now and its all i can do but to think how nice it will be when its over. i'm sorry for the pain i will leave behind. i hope that they will make it thru lifes journey with out me. as this is all i can take.
     
  2. Scully

    Scully Well-Known Member

    Let it out here. Please. Wait longer. Life's also worth living for yourself.
     
  3. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    who is they?
     
  4. klampner1961

    klampner1961 Member

    my friends and family
     
  5. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Hiya, Klampner. :hug:

    I'm really sorry you're feeling so low. SF is a great place to find support and to vent about anything that's bringing you down. Your post sounds like there's a lot weighing on your shoulders.

    I hope you're not really intending to do anything to yourself. We can feel that awful that it seems like an answer, but when we are really emotional, we tend to make really irrational decisions. How about waiting at least a day? For now, maybe you could talk to us here, instead. Could you tell us a bit about what has made everything such a struggle for you?

    Stay strong and stay safe,
    :hug:
    A.
     
  6. klampner1961

    klampner1961 Member

    well lets see, i come from a poor back ground as most. have worked hard all my life built a sucess full business, got married, had a child, built a beautiful home and money was not an issue. the perfect life one might say. then over the last few years the business had began to fail, ended up in divorce, got in big trouble with the law (business related with bad advise from legal council), now looking at jail time, owe everyone in the world money, pretty sure i may be gay or bi at least, attracted to the only ture friend i have hes married, he ok with the feelings i have but wont talk about it with me. about to loose my home and whats left of my business. so whats the point of going on?
     
  7. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Sounds like you're truly one of "us" (SF members). Most (if not all) members here have/had troubles and life issues they'd love to leave behind if they could. I'm sorry to hear all the troubles you've been going through. Sounds like a really rough ride.

    The main reason to stay around is so you can make it better than it is right now...Life is always changing things on us, and there's no reason it can't change for the better rather than the worse.

    The economy started to go downhill a few years ago...probably around the time your business started to slide. A lot of businesses tanked in the last few years. You're not alone with that. Many of the most successful people in business lost several businesses until the right business and circumstances allowed them to settle permanently into a very comfortable lifestyle.

    Ewww...Bad legal advice. :sad: I'm sorry to hear about it. Do you know for sure if you will face jail time (or is that the worst-case outcome)? If it's the worst-case scenario, try not to dwell on it. It hasn't happened yet.

    Debts are hard, especially if we're not used to having them. Money might be tight, but there are options, ranging from basic debt management to bankruptcy. It doesn't make things "good" right away, but it's a way to cope with financial issues.

    I can relate to the divorce as I'm an "ex" myself. Divorce is like being awake during surgery: it hurts! As for your feelings for your friend, it's unfortunate that he's not available. But he's only one of a few ga-zillion people on the planet, and it's probably better to be with a partner who is free to be with you anyway.

    All is not lost, though right now I can imagine you feel it is. I hope you can keep looking for the things that will help you to work your way through this rough time as opposed to ending all time for yourself. Nothing gets better if you off yourself and things can get better.

    :hug:
    A.
     
  8. klampner1961

    klampner1961 Member

    true about alot of people in this world. however not sure i will ever feel like this about anyone but him. cause im my 48 years i have never been so attracted to some one like this. so not only do i have all the crap im dealing with i have him to deal with also and it breaks my heart that he ignors my feelings.
     
  9. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Awww, klampner :hug:

    Thing with that is that you won't know unless you meet others and find out. And 48 isn't old. I worked with someone who had never been married and found romance and a wedding at 48.

    And if "ignores" your feelings, it's probably out of deep respect for you: He cares too much to "lead you on." And as I said before, you deserve someone who is available and who will be committed to you.

    ...just keep holding on, hun.

    :hug:
    A.
     
  10. klampner1961

    klampner1961 Member

    im holding on with everything i have. not sure i will make it, would be alot better if i could find someone like him to help me thru this:lost::lost:
     
  11. WildCherry

    WildCherry Staff Member ADMIN

    You can make it through this. :hug: Keep holding on and reaching out when you need help.
     
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