Nothing changes; Nothing works

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by GameADDict, Sep 17, 2016.

  1. GameADDict

    GameADDict INFP

    My mother has relapsed and started abusing prescription pills again. She has also been drinking and partying heavily, a lot. I wish she would have been able to stay sober. But, sadly, nothing changes and nothing works for my family.

    As I've stated in a previous post, mental illness, suicide and addiction runs in the family. My grandmother was an alcoholic and died by an addiction to pills. She tried Alcoholics Anonymous a myriad of times. However, she would always relapse and it seems as if my mother is following in her footsteps. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, right?

    The same can be said for me. While I haven't relapsed with marijuana. I have relapsed with self-harm more than once. Also, nothing that is supposed to address my mental health works. I've been switching antidepressants ever since I was twelve-ish. And therapy isn't working.

    I've been contemplating suicide for awhile now. I didn't have the means before and I felt bad for my parents. But now my <mod edit - method> and my mother obviously doesn't care. My father would get over my death eventually because it's just in human nature. You mourn and then move on. Nobody else would miss me. I have no friends. And compared to the 7.5+ billion people on this planet, I'm largely insignificant.
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 17, 2016