Nothing fucking changes

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Secret wounds, Oct 13, 2007.

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  1. Secret wounds

    Secret wounds Well-Known Member

    When will all this shit end, im tired of waking up and wishing i was dead. im tired of being here. I hate myself im so fuckin alone no one fuckin understands, why cant someone fuckin kill me.

    im trapped and i want a way out of here i want all this to end. There must be some one who can fuckin help someone who can make me feel better.im so confused about everything i dont even know who i am. i just want out. im unhappy and no one see's that im in pain i dont know what to do. i dont even know why i fuckin bother with my life its not even a fucking life its a pointless existence. Im tired of thinking my thoughts are driving me crazy i think im ill i dont know.

    Im fuckin gutless i could just kill myself right now id be dead by the time they wake up but i fuckin wont i wish i could though i do want to do it. I need help im lost and lonely and theres no one to help me.
     
  2. kath

    kath Well-Known Member

    Hey there.im sorry you feel so bad.i know what you mean about being tired of thinking.......maybe your like me and you think too much.im also sorry your lonely.i often feel lonely too....except in my case i often feel that whether people are there are not.But often they are not or at least i cant see them anyway.There are lots of people here who will listen to you.You are not gutless.You are brave.i think i may die soon.That would be gutless.You are brave for writing out your feelings.For talking to us.im here for you anytime i can be either on the forum or via PM.You sound so alone or lonely.You sound how i so often feel - whether i should or not........I hope it helped you to write that out and i know my words cant help your pain but i hope you manage to stay safe.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 13, 2007
  3. Secret wounds

    Secret wounds Well-Known Member

    Thanks for your reply-I dont want to offend you but talking gets you no where, well in my case it doesnt. I've been coming on here for a good few months and spoke to many people and NOTHING has changed or got slightly better. I dont even know why i come on here i know people are only trying to help but nothing seems to help and i keep wondering do i really want to spend the rest of my days coming on here and telling people i want to kill myself. Wouldnt it just be better to be dead rather than live in misery wishing for death.

    I guess i come on here looking for answers hoping someone will have a answer to my problem that they will save me its pathetic really.
     
  4. kath

    kath Well-Known Member

    You wont offend me.i know my words cannot change peoples pain.That is an issue im trying to deal with right now.i kind of feel quite useless about that.im sorry.

    i too have talked to people for years.

    i too am thinking i should just die.Just wish i had the courage.

    As for answers or people to save you i too used to look for that.Still do sometimes if im honest - cant help it.But the reality is i guess you will always be disappointed.There is no magic wand and from what ive learnt for myself anyway there are also no answers......

    i try to tell people nowadays that im looking for understanding not answers cos ive given up on answers but i guess really the only thing im really lookiing for is my death...

    i need more courage........

    im sorry this is such a negative reply to your thread....it isnt appropriate and im gonna stop.....i really think i should be under moderation here......

    Cos im jsut being so down and negative.

    But as for you please ignore me going off on a tangent and as i said you will never offend me especially by telling me you dont think talking is gonna help you right now.It is ok to be frustrated and i know that my words cannot change your pain.

    im sorry for that but i hope you find your way through.

    i wish i could offer more.Truly i do.And i hope you are as ok as you can be.

    im sorry for my replies.They are messed up.
     
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