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Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Rukia, Oct 7, 2008.

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  1. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

    I'm not sure why I'm posting this, but I guess I just need to get these feelings out. There has been a while since I posted here, I've stayed away from SF because it triggers me. I've been telling people that I'm doing much better, and I almost believed it myself. My psychiatrist thinks that I don't need therapy any more, but she doesn't know that I'm still suicidal.

    I think it's time for me to end it tonight. The suicidal feeling won't go away, and I'm tired of living just because I'm worried about what it'll do to my friends and family. They'll be better off without me. I'm calm now, calm and happy with this decision. Death have to wait a few hours, because I have to visit a friend first, but I'm going to start my suicide now. Goodbye SF people, you have been good to me. :hug:

    I'm sorry for taking up some of your time, I'm not worth it.
     
  2. Pingu

    Pingu Well-Known Member

    have you any idea how much it hurts to loose someone to suicide?
    please, give ur life a chance.. things will get better
     
  3. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

    I don't think things will get better. I've been suicidal since before I was 15.
     
  4. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Please continue trying Rukia. You say things will not get better, but could they be any worse than wanting to take your own life. You have survived all this time. The possibilities for change still exist. What steps are you taking currently to try and rid yourself of these feelings? Sometimes we get stuck min them because they are so familiar we are afraid to be without them and do not open ourselves up to healing. It is not intentional, but does happen more often than you know. You must be a survivor or you wouldn't still be here. Take care Rukia and stay safe. :hug:
     
  5. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Please Rukia, don't go through with your suicide plan. :sad: There has to be a better way. You seem like such a nice person. Don't end your life like this. Your life is worth so much more. You're not wasting anyone's time hun. Please don't give up. :hug:
     
  6. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hello Rukia,
    You said you have been seeing a doctor? Thats fine for meds, but if you want to learn how to cope with these feelings, you need a good therapist!! They dig deep and pull out all that xtra baggage you are carrying around. They will teach you to cope and to not discount the positive thoughts.
    You see there are still paths for you to explore. Don't do this to yourself, keep up the fight and keep posting here, we will be here for you with support and advice. Don't feel bad about talking to us. You will find alot of very caring people here who want to see you shine again!!!
    You may not realize it but you have joined a new family and we stick togethor.Please talk to us because we care!!!~Joseph~
     
  7. Pingu

    Pingu Well-Known Member

    Ville bare fortelle deg at du kan PM meg vist du vil snakke :smile:
     
  8. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

    I'm not good at talking about how I feel. I couldn't tell my psychiatrist that I'm suicidal, and I've told all my friends and family that I'm past that. I've started taking my own life, and if I stop now I might end up dead anyways or at least feeling very sick.
     
  9. notwanting2live

    notwanting2live Well-Known Member

    please dont give up - there is a world out there somewhere for you. please hunni xxx

    PM me anytime xxx
     
  10. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    You say you have already put things in motion? You need to call for an ambulance and get to the hospital! We don't want this!! You are a very special person and we care what happens to you. You need to do this now don't hesitate! Rukia you have touched alot of lives here. We know you are shy and that doesn't matter we love you!! Please call them now!!!
     
  11. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    Please don't do this, Rukia. I don't have any fancy words to say... but I'm here if you need a friend. :hug:
     
  12. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I hope that Rukia is ok. :unsure:
     
  13. Starlite

    Starlite Senior Member


    I sure hope you are you ok Rukia..and that you are safe and have received help! :hug:
     
  14. Rukia

    Rukia Well-Known Member

    I'm ok, or alive at least.
     
  15. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Thank you!!! I was extremely worried about you. You have a kind heart and you shouldn't destroy it. Like I said before in the short time you have been here you have touched some other peoples lives with your words. I really think you should see a therapist so you can get your thoughts under control. Even though you are o.k. now I am still worried about you. I was the same way for years. Then I started seeing Gina my therapist. She has helped me immensely. Take Care and don't do anything to harm yourself!!!~Joseph~
     
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