nothing matters anymore...

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by awb4130578, Feb 9, 2008.

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  1. awb4130578

    awb4130578 Member

    everything is soo fucked up.. i am 19 and a freshman in community college with shitty grades, 2 good jobs i love but i hate going to work, and i hate being home. next saturday my parents aren't gonna be home. i have rope but not enough. i will have to get more. all i need is that and be able to get into the woods that r by my house...and then i'll hang myself...ive been depressed since march 2007 and suicidal since september. what now?... should i tell my friends about this? how would i tell them?... i've been on soo many meds and none of them work. my doc doesn't know i want to hang myself. whatever i tell my docs they tell my parents...i would use a gun but i dont have one and rope is all i got. i got plenty of pills but i hate swallowing pills. i told one of my friends about what i am planning to do... hopefully, for everyone else, he will talk me out of it... i doubt he'll be able to though...i've been hospitalized 3 times 2 weeks each and that doesn't help either...i don't care about anything. all i wanna do is die... i hinted at another friend of mine about kinda hoping/kinda not that he'll talk to me about it...
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 9, 2008
  2. nagisa

    nagisa Staff Alumni

    The fact that you are telling people shows me that there is a part of you (however small) that doesn't want to kill yourself. You should hold on the will to live as tightly as possible. I'm here if you ever want to talk. Feel free to PM me. Take care!! :hug:
  3. pit

    pit Well-Known Member


    I don't have any jobs.
  4. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Agreed. There's apart of you that doesn't want this. No matter how small that part of you is, hang on to it, it will grow in time again.
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