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Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Unregistered1966, Feb 5, 2008.

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  1. I'm 42 unemployed,and sleeping on my mums settee since i lost my job and flat over 2 years ago. But things were bad long before that. Almost ever since i can remember i've wanted to die, i'm not angry with the world, or the way my life has turned out, i just don't see the point.Nothing ever changes, i just get alittle older and sadder each day.

    I've been a member of this board for about a month, and you guys do great work.
    I want to stay anonymous because i'm still active on the board, and don't want people here to know . When i go, i don't want to cause anyone any pain, i'll just stop posting. Until then i will try and help anyone who needs it.

    Suicide isn't a solution to the problem,mearley a way of avoiding the pain life can sometimes bring. And yes i know i could probably muddle on for the next 40 or 50 years,but why should i.This isn't a knee jerk reation to any one thing or person. I will never be normal, or truely happy or anything. I has always felt odd, out of touch with what it means to be human.

    3 years ago i almost died of an overdose, i spent 5 days in hospital, and then was referred to a psychiatric hospital. I been to therapy had the drugs and still i feel the same. Maybe i'm not depressed, maybe it's just me. Maybe i was born broken.

    Not sure why i'm posting, i don't want any help, i've already decided to go, i guess i just want a little piece of me left behind.

    I could ramble on, but my story isn't much differnt from most on here, i lack the basic tools for survival and so i surrender myself to god.

    If god wants to punish me for my sins,then go ahead.
  2. Dreamer uk

    Dreamer uk Well-Known Member

    You have the tools for survival, 4 billion years of evolution has seen to that, you just think you lack them because of the depression brought on by the pressures of the modern world.

    Being depressed is just a natural state of mind, it is proposed as 'rank theory', which has evolved to facilitate losing.

    But you can beat this thing, and only you, make a list of things to do to try to improve your life and stick with it, try to take little steps forward and hopefully one day you will find the happiness & contentment you seek.
    God isn't punishing you, he has planted the seed for all life, and then left us to it. You are only being punished by yourself and the harsh uncaring environment that we call society.

    Try to be strong and hang onto a glimmer of hope, there is always hope.

    2 Years ago you had a job and your own flat, you can get back to a position in life where you want to be, the task is not insurmountable.

    I know things are difficult and I'm probably not much help, I just thought I'd let you know that you are not alone, you need to fight this depression. Maybe go and see the doctor and see if you can get on some medication which will help you feel better about yourself and give you the strength to continue in this life.

    Take care, best wishes
  3. anonymous1

    anonymous1 Guest

    Unregistered1966, I don't know why, but it makes me really sad to hear that you're giving up. I have no idea who you are, but I feel like I know you. Like I'll be you in a few years. Like maybe I'm you now. I don't want to tell you not to do anything you have your mind set on, but I do want to ask you what it is that drove you to this place? I know you mentioned losing your job and living with your mother. I have a job now but I still live with my mom. I'm just hoping maybe you can shed some light on your own life so as to maybe shed some on mine. I've already failed so miserably at life, I guess I'm just hoping you might have some tips for me on what to avoid so I don't lose this battle completely.
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