Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by dying_inside, Dec 5, 2015.

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  1. dying_inside

    dying_inside Well-Known Member

    I know nothing
    I want nothing
    I enjoy nothing
    I have made nothing with my life
    Except for family of origin (which i love and hate at the same time) i have nothing
    I am nothing

    What i think is confused
    What i feel is confused
    What i do and say are confused

    I had a plan. Failed. New plan. On track.
    But this is all in my head.
    I cant express this
    I cant make people understand me
    I cant understand myself either.
    I just feel so alone. In this mess with no way out and living each and everyday is just too HARD. I'm just so sick of it all. Of life, of me.
    And nothing helped or helps...
  2. Lily76

    Lily76 New Member

    Am so sorry you are feeling like this must be hurting so much * hugs*
    i feel the same sometimes i feel that am worthless that am nothing just like you have said here
    i remember my family yes they can be a pain in the ass yes they make things hard and are embarrassing sometimes
    but theses people love you no matter what
    i lost my step dad to suicide i loved him like he was my own father he brought me up and was in my life everyday
    its devastating losing someone like that please dont do this ...things will get better ...hold on and keep fighting
    i care i know you dont know me but if you ever need to talk to someone am here
  3. True-Lee

    True-Lee Well-Known Member

    dying_inside, We know that feeling, I know that feeling, mine wasn't in my head, I am sorry that you feel like that, Here, Now You don't have to be alone. I am here for you, We are here for you, I feel your pain as you utter those words, I have been in that exact same spot more times then I care to remember! I made lots of plans as well, at first not for dying but for living! They Failed so Yes I too made Plans like you did, I carried them out, I am still here. Right here Right Now I am here for you! You Do Not Have to be alone in here, You know that we understand you! Right now it is hard you are in that Depressing state where nothing good exists to You! It is there but You cannot see it, you cannot feel it the world is upside down it is all twisted and confusing! Nothing Makes any sense anymore, Please Hold on! This Pain diminishes as it passes, it is not perfect but it is somehow better, better then that narrow dark place where we can never see or Feel Hope, Laughter, and Never Feel good! All those thoughts and feelings can exist again, no matter what you are feeling now, Tomorrow can be a better Brighter Day, I am sorry that you have these feelings Now, They Can and Will Pass. We are here for each other, We are here now for you! Please Wait for that Brighter Light!
  4. dying_inside

    dying_inside Well-Known Member

    Thanks you Lily and True Lee,

    I guess i'm just SOOOO tired of everything....
  5. badperson123

    badperson123 Member

    My name is Anthony and I come from an Eastern European country where I feel like shit every single day of my life. I think that I somewhat understand you. You, like me, can't find solace in the people surrounding you in your daily life, You like me, might see life as totally pointless, because the matter of the fact is, if you're not religious there is none. Nothing that used to bring you happiness does anymore. I can't really understand myself either. I sit before this computer and am reminded of all the rejection I have felt by those around me that you likely have felt to.

    The thing is, people care about us, be it your family or your friends. There is so much beauty to be found in life. Sure we feel like crap and everything seems to be bad, but there are people out there who care. I CARE. I don't know you, but I feel just like you and being a 20 year old, I am very unhappy with what my life has become, I think I feel just like you do. No matter what you might feel, if you zoom out enough and leave the things that make you unhappy behind, you can't admit that theres nothing beautiful about the world we live in. The breathtaking formations that resulted in galaxies and even nature on earth, they bring to me tears at times and I think thats worth living for.
    I encourage you to message me if you'd like to talk further.
    Don't give up.
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