#nothing2live4

Discussion in 'Mental Health Disorders' started by JuvenileF(_)ck(_)p, Apr 17, 2013.

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  1. JuvenileF(_)ck(_)p

    JuvenileF(_)ck(_)p New Member

    <mod edit- asking method>
    i'm sick of life, ima burden on society, my mom just died from a heart attack, and im pretty sure it was because of me, my life has gone to shit, i live in a group home now, i hate my life, i dont want to be here anymore.
    i put my mom through financial trouble, stole her car while i was drunk, decided to go drifting with my friends, hit a car head on, and then a tree, one of my friends got ejected out the car, and is in critical condition, and will never be the same again mentally.
    i live my life in regret and i cant handle it anymore. i'm considered a "Juvenile Deliquent" i have 16 citations at 16 years old, from car shopping, aggravated assault, to drug charges, mostly marijuana and a DUI
    I just want to leave this world and never come back. i hate my self. i hate who i am. i hate what i did. i hate life in general. I MISS MY MOM, AND I JUST WANT HER BACK ;(
    i'm just lookin for an easy way out, someone just please help me.

    Sincerely, a 16 year old boy from Bismarck, North Dakota.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 17, 2013
  2. NYJmpMaster

    NYJmpMaster Have a question? Message Me Staff Member Forum Owner ADMIN

    I am not going to say I know how you feel - I do not. I am certain there is enough pressure and stress on your right now to justify your feeling like that and do not have an easy answer or fix to any of it.

    I do not really over share a lot about my real life but a small exception here- I was a foster parent for many years. We had a lot of teenagers come through our home as well as having 3 teenagers of our own. Without exception it was dire circumstance that brought these teens to our home. Many from group homes likely similar to where you are now- all with family issues or no family, most with history of abuse and struggling with drugs or alcohol, and majority with legal issues.

    Every one of them hated the group homes when first placed - and I am fairly confident all or the majority hated our home when first placed. It is natural -- totally different, different rules and structure, people you do not even know getting in your business and talking about you like you are not really there or an object "to be placed". All, regardless of situation missed there mother or parents horribly and on more than one occasion no longer had parents to look forward to going back to.

    There will likely never be a time more difficult for you than where you are at right now. You made mistakes, but so does everybody else- you had the misfortune of a mistake that many many people make having the consequences people warn of. 95% of the people that may condemn you for what happened could by a very small twist of fate be in a very similar position. Many many people have drunk then drove and done stupid crap and by pure luck did not have the same end result. Even more put themselves into the same situation as your friend. There are not enough people in the world to throw stones at you or your actions that could not have had the same things happen to them to be concerned with their opinion. Your mother's health is a health issue -- you did not make her have a heart attack - her body did it. Stress or whatever- it would not matter if not a health issue to begin with. You are sad and should be- you are not responsible for it however.

    The one thing that all the teenagers have in common that came through our home is they all came out on the other side - out of the dark place from where they started - and emerged in a better place. Eventually the present becomes the past and the sooner you begin looking at what you can do now the better you will be. You are very aware of the mistakes you have made so consider how to not make more mistakes tomorrow or next week or next month.... Choose not to fight against where you are now but to fight to improve the situation and placement (even if it means a certain amount of jumping through hoops to do that).

    I have seen and worked with too many teenagers with huge problems and had them learn to be happy again and cope with life and build a future to believe you cannot do the same.

    Take Care and Be Safe

    Ben
     
  3. Theodora

    Theodora Well-Known Member

    I'm with Ben. Put your energy into the things you can do now to make a good future for yourself. You know what not to do. Finding out out how to be different is harder than doing nothing but worth it,as you are. Good luck.
     
  4. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    Yes definitely put your energy into something you want to do, if you want have a career change your life around and get help, get yourself back into studying or work. You only have one life remember, its your time to decide where you want to go.
     
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