Now this is my kind of Christmas poem

Discussion in 'The Coffee House' started by attack_amazon, Dec 24, 2008.

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  1. attack_amazon

    attack_amazon Well-Known Member

    As a disclaimer, I have no idea who wrote this, it was sent to me in an e-mail today. But it's still awesome, so I thought I'd share it.

    'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Hall
    Not a creature was stirring, not warrior nor thrall.
    And I in my armor, my greaves and my helm
    Was drunker than anyone else in the Realm.

    I staggered upstairs and fell into bed
    While four quarts of mead were ablaze in my head.
    Then up from below came the sounds of a brawl
    So I grabbed up my axe and ran down to the Hall.

    I missed the last step and crashed down in a heap
    Thinking, "Why can't those low-lifes downstairs go to sleep!"
    When what to my wondering eyes should appear
    But two brawny strangers, wielding mallet and spear.

    I said to myself, "We'll soon have them beat!"
    Then I noticed ten warriors laid out at their feet.
    I gave out a yell and leapt into the fray...
    I'll always regret my poor choice of that day.

    For the one laid his hammer to the side of my nose
    And up, up, up to the rafters I rose.
    Then came a lone frightened voice from the floor,
    "Those are no mortal warriors -- that's Odin and Thor!"

    Then they looked at each other and they said, "Battle's done.
    Now they know who we are, it no longer is fun."
    Then Thor raised his hammer, and his elbow he bent,
    And with a loud crash, through the ceiling they went.

    I crawled through the Hall and flung open the door,
    Not really sure that I'd seen them before.
    The snow bathed in starlight, the moon like a glede,
    I saw them ride off on an eight-legged steed.

    And I heard them exclaim, 'ere they flew out of sight,

  2. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Interesting take on Samuel Clemens poem.
  3. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I like it :) Thank you for sharing :hug:
  4. LenaLunacy

    LenaLunacy Well-Known Member

    Cool poem :)
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