now what

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Fuzzy Monkey, Dec 14, 2007.

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  1. Fuzzy Monkey

    Fuzzy Monkey Well-Known Member

    i woke up this moring and went to school only to find out that my best friend jessica killed herself last night she did an overdose im failing 3 of my classes i got in a fight at school. ive been called a killer. it shouldve been me not her
    she had loving parents they tried to give her everything they can. i amtempted to od this morning but eliza wouldnt let me. come home mom dosent ask how was my day or y are u cryin she starts yelling at me. 1 hr ago i cut and now im sitting in front of my laptop crying, she couldve took me with her!! how do i bring her back i want her back just last night i was telling her everything was gonna be ok and not to be scared shes not alone. im a failure i failed helping her. what made me think i could help her if i cant even help myself. it shouldve been me!!!
  2. jonstark

    jonstark Well-Known Member

    Should've been neither of you.
    I'm so sorry FH :(.
  3. Fuzzy Monkey

    Fuzzy Monkey Well-Known Member

    thanks guys its not your fault ive been wishing death on me for almost 5yrs and i just cant have it.
  4. Veclord

    Veclord Active Member

    Like I said before. Don't blame yourself. Always remember that you were a good friend to the very end and that the choice she made wasn't because of you or influenced by you.

    Slow down your life some and remember the good times you shared. It always hurts losing a friend while so young, just don't put so much blame on yourself. You did what you could. That's what counts.
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