In real life I no longer have a place to feel I belong. Here, I don't belong. Yet my suicide urges accept me, give me someplace to belong. What the hell is so wrong with me that the world makes me feel like nothing better than a piece of shit?! yet the very thing that everyone critizes me for, wanting to grasp the reality of death rather than hope in being alive, is the very thing that makes me worthless to those around me. I wont do this bullshit anymore.