Numb enough to end it..

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by Kiba, Dec 22, 2010.

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  1. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Well.. atm I'm so numb Im not really caring about anyone at the moment.. eh.. just tired. not myself. dont wana say much.

    Good as dead.. really
  2. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    Well Im siting here with -method- round my neck and just got do it :p

    anyway.. feel free to talk to me b4 I do.
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 23, 2010
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    im here not a good way just cause yourself alot pain maybe even brain damage.
    this time year is hard but you can get through t okay please call crisis line get some help now okay :hugtackles:
  4. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    eh.. yea.. decided to wait :/ ugh.. idk.. lookin at other crap.. so much I could do to die X_X eh.. just wana feel sane. :blub:
  5. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    ugh.. I may end up calling crisis.. I keep going into PTSD problems and I do crazy stuff.. I cant seem to keep myself safe living alone but.. If I go to hospital I may end up in lock down and loose my apartment and my cat :blub:

    ugh.. Fucking A :(
  6. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    want to feel normal to i do but hopefully with meds and therapy we can feel better i don't know i am so low too just want you to do i am here and i really wish you did feel so low i wish you could reach out to someone anyone around you if not call okay just talk to someone i thelps:hugtackles:
  7. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    they won't lock you down just tell them you need some help to stabilize and you need to get home for cat maybe they will increase medication or give you a new one to try. but keep safe okay little kitty will need you.
  8. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    i think you should go back to the hospital and let them know that you came home too soon. you are obviously still in crisis. it's the best place for you right now. can someone come and look after your cat?
  9. Cute_Angel_Xx

    Cute_Angel_Xx Account Closed

    Hey Swift,

    Sorry to hear you are feeling low **hug** Do you have coucelling or therapy at all? I think you should call a crisis hotlineas it looks like you are feeling really low and everyone would hate to see you hurt **hug**
  10. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    well.. Called crisis line last night after I got out of my PTSD mode (thats kinda when I get suicidal..) uh.. they didnt really say much, but seeing my therapist in about 30 min.. ugh..

    See, I said they may put me in lock down, because last time I was in the hospital this past week they suggested it but when they did I auto went into PTSD mode cuz some of my PTSD is from Lock Down facilities as a teenager.. and well.. I just freaked out by the idea.. but.. Im wondering if it would actually be helpful..

    At the same time however, I'm wanting to take this PTSD challenge head on. Ive conquered my depression for the most part, its simply the PTSD that brings me back into it. And Ive been completely off psychiatric meds for 2 weeks and am a LOT better without them now. Seriously! But I wouldn't suggest everyone who's been on meds get off. Ive done a TON of therapy and so Im now able to cope with my depression without the medications help.

    Anyway, if I did go into a lock down, they would more then likely make me take medications again, but Ive already tried almost everything in the book! But yea.. Im going to see what my therapist says.

    The other thing with going into the lock down would be, If Im there more then a month I have to report to the state and most likely they wont give me my disability funds, thus I loose my apartment while Im gone.. and thus my cat has no place to go. :blub:

    So hopefully my therapist can help me figure out what to do.. Thanks for all the support. And sorry for the long reply! :)
  11. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    hey Swift!

    I hope that you are doing ok.

    wish I could help!!!!

    :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:
  12. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    eh.. well Im alright. My therapist and I didnt do much.. more then half the time was taking pics of my cat LOL heh. X_X

    Anyway uh.. duno.. getting a bit down again and starting to think about suicide again but.. ugh.. idk.. trying to stay positive.. :(
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