Numbing my Pain

Discussion in 'Poet's Corner' started by Almost_There, Feb 23, 2010.

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  1. Almost_There

    Almost_There Active Member

    I have a lot of poetry, some good, most bad. I write a lot with my life, if for anything to let it out, it usually doesnt help, but now I write to leave my story and a bit of my defeated soul behind. If anyone wants more, PM me or leave a post. I dont know how long I will be here, but for today..

    Numbing my Pain

    Darkend heart, broken mind
    knowing again as I say goodbye
    this life, this world
    and me again falling of the short
    as nothing is numbing my pain

    I had friends, I even had love
    feeling warm in her body, was always enough
    its gone asking now what do I do
    my everything is gone, everything I knew
    as nothing is numbing my pain

    my wings gone as the night came black
    looking around eyes gone light in lack
    I was at those gates, bright as can be
    I knew finally this was heaven I see
    could it be I had numbed the pain?..

    But it was a trick brought upon me
    it was wrong, that thing I thought could be
    how could something like me be here
    with all my sins brought to bear
    as nothing is numbing my pain

    I cock the gun looking in the chamber
    something so small, this something my savior
    free me, release my trapped soul
    let me feel something...something I have not known
    as nothing is numbimg my pain

    A bit of time away from this pain
    please..god..take anything, please take it away
    free me from this curse, this burden of ache
    if not for me, then for your other childrens sake
    as nothing is numbing my pain

    I destroy and I kill their minds
    all along telling me they are fine
    but gone is their love and my heart
    here is my end, gone from the start
    as I know how to numb my pain

    Leave this plane, take the final bow
    no more decisons not even how
    for I told you my method of choice
    I scream it with my defeated voice
    as nothing is numbing my pain

    This body this soiled mind
    these thoughts no longer needed to hide
    when Im gone, my plague dies too
    And maybe they will know, I did this for you
    as nothing is numbing my pain

    Infect you it wont, this it cant be
    Leave me now, for I know this you dont want to see
    as I placed the barrel to my head
    I close my eyes finally at my end
    as maybe this will numb my pain..
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    No it won't it may even bring you more pain It will definitely bring others more pain. YOu words say so much reveal so much pain and anquish. I had a babysister do what you did all that happened was he is blind now for life and he is being taken care of for life. You need help to numb you pain professional help and medication my meds numb my pain. You have a poets soul so sensitive please throw away you tool and numb the pain with therapy and meds
  3. Almost_There

    Almost_There Active Member

    Ty for those kinds words, seeking professional help is not an option for me thou. I can not afford it, and I have a fear of hospitals. I would happily die in a gutter cold and alone then in a hospital bed. Ive been in and out of them for years upon years. Maybe just some of us are meant to die by our own hands, with all evidence pointing in that direction it is hard to ignore sometimes.
  4. 41021

    41021 Banned Member


    please keep writing

    and i am sorry i can't say more, i can, i just can't get the words out
  5. Things

    Things Well-Known Member

    This actually moved me. I feel inspired to write a new song, or at least a small rhyme ~

    I wish I could put into words how much I like this. But I'm having trouble communicating today.

    My favorite part is the first paragraph, and this line: something so small, this something my savior
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