Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by mpang123, May 22, 2013.

  1. mpang123

    mpang123 Well-Known Member

    I am obsessed with a neighbor who i had sexual relationship with jim a whi ago. We have boke up because he didn't want a Committed rrelationship but a casual one. Somewhere down the line i secretly fell in love with him and when he found out we broke all ties with each other and now hes moved on but im still stuc fantasizing a bout him and jealous of the friendships he has with my neighbor and his girlfriend. I can't forgive myself for ever liking him and it hurts a lot. Is this common that sometimes people get hurt like that?
  2. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Eccentric writer, general weirdo, heedless heathen

    Well, it sounds like he just wanted to be friends with benefits and you wanted more. Relationships don't work out well if one person feels more strongly than the other, whether it's a romantic relationship or just a friendship. It can be hard to move on from that, but it will be the best not to dwell on it, and to find someone who will care about you as much as you care about them.
  3. lelantgirl

    lelantgirl Well-Known Member

    This must be very hard for you, maybe at the start it was just sex but then you developed feelings towards him, its like a physical kick in the guts and teeth when love is not reciprocated, especially when there are other people on the scene. It must be hard to see him with the neighbour and girlfriend, but its NOT your fault you love him, so please dont blame yourself, we cant help who we fall in love with, I been there myself and its devastating.

    To answer your question, yes sadly its common to get hurt like this, some people seem to get over and move on quickly, others take longer, some never do, there is nothing wrong with you or bad with you for loving him, its part of human nature.
    I wonder how old you are if you dont mind me asking, is this the first love? Its a shame I suppose he didn't say before you got hurt that he didn't wish for a committed relationship, men can be very daft indeed and lack brains alot of the time! Please keep telling us how you feel, and if it helps you can send me personal message and I shall reply. Take care and remember its not a sin to love someone, its a very beautiful and caring thing.