Oh, GOD... just a suggestion of what to **AVOID**

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by ToHelp, Sep 18, 2008.

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  1. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Ronnie Milsap, Greatest Hits. Straight out of the seventies.

    Here's the problem: 30 years. That's the fucking problem.

    I had WOEFULLY underestimated the raw surge of emotions brought on from hearing these songs for the first since... well, put it this way.

    The last time I actually HEARD and LEARNED those songs, my mom and dad were still alive.

    Oh My God you want to know what that can do to you??? Many parts you'd forgotten and now remember, enmeshed with memories of the people; of the era.

    JESUS it was pure overload and I sobbed my eyes out. Snot all over--I was a mess.

    I'll never, ever see that youth nor have those dreams in my naivete I boldy once boldy dreampt again, EVER.

    This is...

    Well unless I can this depression under control, this is will be the death of me. The PAIN, very raw, of times past.

    The dreams year-by-year through the eighties either crushed or simply dismantled in epiphanies of very dark enlightenment portending that life would--nay--COULD, never be what you once in your innocence dreamed.

    I'm telling you, it will either lift or the weight alone will surely lead to my demise.

    Do you see? I understand now. I understand better how, why, and when a sane, rational person can choose their own self-deliverance.

    Put another way - I ain't living this shit. If this is some fucking cosmic joke, I'm not playing. Not like this. Not for years--HELL no.

    Sigh. Well I had to get that out. Geez. Thanks SF & members for listening, for caring.

    :cry: ToHelp
     
  2. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    Sometimes hearing certain songs can bring up emotions inside of us. :hug:
     
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    They can generate so many thoughts, feelings, and memories. Music can be very powerful.
     
  4. nagisa

    nagisa Chat & Forum Buddy Staff Alumni

    Like the people above me said, music is very powerful and can easily bring people to an emotional crisis. I'm here if you need to talk to someone. I'm sorry you're so upset. :( :hug:
     
  5. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    ^

    i'm votin' that biggest understatement of the day, eh? lol



    :sadhug: & ty so much everyone, I'll be all right but SHEESH what a reminder, damn.

    -JOHN-
     
  6. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    But John, then there's good ole AC/DC oi? You rock hun so I salute you. Yep you're going to find those bumps along the way. And yep you're going to fall hard. That's when you turn the the music off and listen to your friends that are there to pick you back up. You are not a quitter by a long shot. You've been fighting a good fight, but it's inbetween rounds right now. So take a much needed breather, clean up the scrapes and bruises, and get ready to step right back into the ring!! You CAN do this John!! Besides I bet the 3 year olds hot lunch money on ya!! Dont disappoint hun (lol)!!!
     
  7. Terry

    Terry Antiquities Friend Staff Alumni

    Been there..done that..Crash Test Dummies are definetly a no no where I'm concerned :sad: Sheesh even saying the name............
    Get out something that rocks your socks and makes you happy.....will probably be put in the stocks and be beaten to death with aubergines..but ABBA always makes me smile.
     
  8. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Oi!

    Ahh but Carla, 'twas the period (my folks were alive for instance, combined with the fact I didn't even get rock until.... hell, mid-eighties) that was the doozie.

    >>You are not a quitter by a long shot.<<

    You know? I dunno why but that is one hell of a shot in the arm? Than you, madam.
     
  9. max0718

    max0718 Well-Known Member

    I think its sometimes important to experience such emotions.. Obviously in moderation, and if the songs make you suicidal then once is obviously enough. But after all, we are human, not animals and we're bound to have such feelings from time to time. I'm sorry that you miss your parents so. Hope your day picks up!
     
  10. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Yep, I am 51 and still rockin: listening to nickleback right now! If you want to jam listen to Saliva, Puddle O Mudd, Nirvana, AC/DC, Staind, amongst alot of others. Those are the top bands I listen to right now. When I am really down I go in my room and crank the music, It calms me down..:chopper:..
     
  11. ToHelp

    ToHelp Well-Known Member

    Oi!

    You go kid, :thumbup: I just bought an unbeleivable 5.1 sorround system with nearly 1,000 watts of power, sub-woofer is amazing.

    Now. in the eithgties people would have like "are you KIDDING me?" lol

    And indeed, I thought I was doing just fine (and was, really) with my older 150w/channel Sony stereo receiver, but DAMN.

    I have learned anew about raw POWER.

    Current rock--sure, absolutely but right now I am jamming me arse off with Zeppelin, AC/DC, MIlsap, Randy Travis (I appreciate both genres!), all my 150 or so collections and you guess it - all cassette, lol.

    Yet with this wattage, it really is a whole different experience and I'm inclned to agree with Bob Seger:

    Just give that oldtime-a rock and roll
    That kind song of music just move the soul.


    (Even though HE was pining for the previous generation to AC/DC
    / KISS. lol)

    :laugh:

    (Btw, "Oi" is our refence to TNT.)

    You know, the hell of it is, you think you have... some "corner" on the best talent out there--but damn Stranger: With each generation comes fresh new talent. It never stops.

    Oh - also seriously love some bluegrass. The present king IMO? Skaggs, baby. Ricky Skaggs.

    I like how Ricky Skaggs characterizes never bluegrass (for a while there dubbed called 'newgrass', bleh) as it doesn't really evolve like rock does. He said:

    Today's bluegrass is just the old bluegrass performed with respect.

    I love music. I'd die to be able to play the stuff but that logic makes about as much sense as wiping before you poop. :tongue:

    -JOHN-
     
  12. max0718

    max0718 Well-Known Member

    Zeppelin - Best band ever! nuff said.. :biggrin:
     
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