Well..what can I say...it will be a long story but I consider myself an entertaining person so I might as well give you guys something to read. To begin with I was born in the hot summer…a premature baby of only 7 moths old……. A lot of problems at birth I almost died once because the oxygen supply shut off in the hospital….sometimes I wish that It is better to have died then. I grew up with my grandparents since I was 2 years old my parents split divorced when I was 2. I know I was an unwanted child, they know I was an unwanted child but nobody will recognize this I’m so pissed about this I want them to admit that I was the thing that forced them to get married. Oh well…to continue I lived my childhood as an unwanted child always being told how stupid I was, how the world would be a better place without me ant to top it all off my grandparents perfect saying was “you mother should of shit next to a fence instead of giving birth to you”. Ok so fast forward to school days where I was bullied for being the most honest and straight forward guy the world has ever see. A few feeble attempts of puppy love at 12-13 …tragically failed…..then I got fat…I was a fat guy until I was 19..my grandparents told me that I was fat and made fun at me when the got mad. I lost a lot of weight at 19 trying literally to destroy my body with lots of caffeine and no sleep + no eating. I finally got bellow the average recommended healthy weight… I’m 1.93 cm and now 85kg’s… I should have been 93 ..so I fell in love with this girl….i loved her dearly…she loved me back..i got my first kiss from hewr…and my first night of love….( ) ……it went on for a year……then she sayd..a few days after we came home from vacation..she sayd that she woke up one day and she did not love me anymore . I “packed up” and never called her…I almost died…I had nightmares..i woke up suffocating and with crippling heart aches….. I almost died trying to dial the equivallent to “ 911” here…. I fell down on the cement ..i only dialed “9” ..i woke up …again.teribble pains…but I pulled through… I still love her..i still think about her..i’m trying to rebuild my life but I have confusing feelings…I’m afraid to feel..i’m afraid to love again……I like another girl…she’s sweet..but she’s a very “red blooded” woman…. Hasn’t loved anybody..and she says she wants to love…the right guy..i want to be that guy..but..i don’t know if I should..i’m afraid that it could happen again…damn..and I have’t even been out on a first date with her we’ve just got it planed. I like her….i’m afraid…..i don’t know what to feel..i still love my ex…damn
Before this girl gave me a reason to live..i planned to end my life before i was 25.......now..i'm confused..i don't want to kill myself..i just feel sooeeee empty
I keep a very good shield as a fun person..i crack a lot of jokes i'm a real funny guy...but...it's only a shell..i'm empty inside...... when i gome home..at night..it's just me and my emotional scars
Before this girl gave me a reason to live..i planned to end my life before i was 25.......now..i'm confused..i don't want to kill myself..i just feel sooeeee empty
I keep a very good shield as a fun person..i crack a lot of jokes i'm a real funny guy...but...it's only a shell..i'm empty inside...... when i gome home..at night..it's just me and my emotional scars
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