Okay, who the hell am I supposed to believe?

[solutions]

My primary diagnosis was manic-depression type 1 with psychotic features for a very long time. For whatever reason, my psychiatrist decided to change the diagnosis to Mood Disorder Not Otherwise Specified With Psychotic Features. Apparently I broke too out of the mold of manic-depression, or something. That's the only one I mention if I ever have to reveal diagnoses.

But other clinicians have tried their own hand at me. One thought OCD, although this is definitely not the case. When I was at the hospital, I was given two personality disorders: Avoidant and Borderline. The neuropsychologist decided on Avoidant Personality Disorder with Borderline Features. I'm not sure what I did to get both Borderline and Avoidant, seems like an odd combo. I can kind of understand Avoidant, since I keep all my friends at a distance because I've never been the best with intimacy. Borderline? Nah. I barely fit any of the criteria. The only ones I do hit are: Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation, delusions or severe dissociative symptoms; and Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days). The others, not so much.

But my question is, who cares? What is all this supposed to mean to me? How much of it is valid? Considering that I have two conflicting diagnoses that are impossible to put together, definitely not all of it.

 

[aoeu]

Okay, as you've been pointing out the treatment matters much more than the diagnosis.

Mood disorder diagnosis is definitely irrelevant. Seek DBT if you think you've got BPD, seek any other kind of therapy otherwise. Most important: that you enter therapy.

As to bipolar or mood disorder NOS, it sounds like you're going to be treated with antipsychotics either way. I would go with pure bipolar treatment if I were you, at least for the moment. If it fails, then try something else.

 

[solutions]

Oh, my treatment's perfectly fine. I'm for the most part content on the meds I'm on, and although I'm not in therapy, it's because I choose not to be.

What I'm really asking is just, if I were given a sheet of paper with a line that says, "Official Diagnosis", which ones are the valid ones? Or do I just pick the ones my current psychiatrist diagnoses (Mood NOS)? I consider that my most important and vital diagnosis.

And yes, I'm on antipsychotics, those fucking things. I hate them, but I'm forced to take them.