I've OD twice over the years. And, I hope it is allowed to say here, years ago I decided <mod edit: *sparkle* : methods>. It wasn't in the heat of the moment thing, only that when I was OK it was found out that I had them. The second one did turn into a big deal in that I was out of state in hosp. and it had to be negociated with my family to get rid of it. I feel that I need to learn how to live with having one, because other wise my thought would always turn to getting one. I've had my third one for 5 yrs. and let my old doc know a couple of times and that I needed to learn to live with it. I don't know if he was trying to build trust with me or know I would get another, but he never said anything about it. Now I've chosen not to say anything about it to my new therapist. But for some reason I keep bringing it up as something I can't tell her about, so I guess a part of me as I'm struggling now wants to tell her, but I'm really conflicted about it. I know I would be angry with myself for telling her, and would likely be in the situation of thinking about getting another until I got a forth one. It sucks and I hate not being honest with her and feel like an idiot for bringing up the thing I can't tell her about. Family and friends who knew about the first and/or second ones have never asked me if I have another one. No one really wants to know.