Old Ways

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by DownInaHole1, Apr 12, 2007.

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  1. DownInaHole1

    DownInaHole1 New Member

    i first started self harming at about 11 years old. By 13 years old i was seriously into it and could not stop, i finally stopped at age 16. Ive recently started again badly, and started drinking again. I know i can stop doing it but i just dont want too. Its a release from the pain i am given everyday recently, instead of before of just getting on with what was bothering me, ive once again turned to the knife, and the drink, im not so much wanting advice or anything as there cant be much advice to be had. I just really wanted to let it out and hopefully a few people understand what i mean. Im not in a desperate state just instead of doing the obvious thing and stop cutting cause i know that i can .... im not stopping because im becoming addicted to how self harm feels :mellow: .. its just numbing the pain for me at the moment, i know i should stop ... but i dont want too .. without cutting im just mellow, boring and depressing ... once i cut im fine on the outside. Argh i dunno :\. I know this cant be helped at all ... just hoping someone is going/been through this phase ? ... Thanks for listening.
     
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    First off, well done for tackling cutting the first time round. That takes great strength, so well done you.

    You mention that this is releasing you from the pain you have everyday, do you want to tell us about this pain?

    I am not going to try and convince you to stop, or even tell you to or anything. That's not productive or helpful, but there are a lot of strategies or techniques out there that could help you if you wanted to stop. ie, if you can figure out what you achieve by cutting, there will be another, more positive way, to achieve it.

    Have you ever had professional help?

    They won't make you stop either, but they can help you with the pain that you feel, either emotional/mental, or even physical pain, coming to deal with it.

    No one deserves to be in pain all the time, and it's important that you find someone to help you deal with the pain. SI and alcohol can only 'deal' with it short term, but you need hlep to heal the pain in the long term, so that you don't feel this crap forever.

    Hopefully, with time, as you heal the pain that you are feeling, the need to harm yourself, or block out what's going on, will lessen. It won't necessarily be a conscious choice to stop, you might just find yourself doing it less, etc.

    Take care of yourself and hang in there
     
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