I'm not as close as most people on here seem to be. The first time I SI was after my first serious relationship broke up. I took the scissors and I lightly scraped the blades over my arm. Nothing more then what looked like a few dog nail marks. I'm not sure why I did it then, I wanted him to see on the outside how I was hurting inside. Years later even with bouts of depression I hadn't done anything like it again. Until the same situation came up again, a relationship ended and while crying I ended up pulling my nails down my face to the point one left a mark and again with the scissors. It has only happened in these times. It's very confusing because I have never considered myself as a 'self harmer' but I guess I am on that road.