I am feeling increasingly desperate about having to attend a medical examination by Atos who are systematically removing people from incapacity benefit on the orders of the government. I have been on Incapacity benefit for about 7 years with anxiety and depression although I have suffered mental health problem for nearly 40 years. I am a reformed alcoholic, I became an alcoholic after pleading with my doctor for help with my problems around 25 years ago I was merely told to "pull myself together" I was devastated and alone, In my desperation I started drinking heavily to control the crippling anxiety, using alcohol to self medicate, but of course the drinking escalated over the years until I could no longer cope and sought help from the Samaritans as I could not get the thought out of my mind that I should kill myself. I received a year of counselling to come off the alcohol but the debilitating anxiety remains. I will never go back to the drink i would rather kill myself first than live in that hell again but its the only way I know of to cope with the fear of this impending sham medical examination and the aftermath when I am unable to cope. I have just adapted my life to avoiding situations for the last 7 years, I live a solitary existence and can not cope with stress at all. I feel ending this misery would be a release from the torment. Why are the government persecuting people like this? Is their intention to make life so intolerable for us that this becomes our only choice?