So one of the things that has kept me hanging on is concern over how my ex would handle it. Long story short, she was a friend, she was married, we crossed the line, fell in love, they split, but in the end the she went back to him. That said, even after they reunited we stayed in contact and continued to meet, once again underground. Neither of us wanted to let go. After a long break we've been e-mailing recently and she said in her last e-mail that she feels better about us and can think about me without feeling sad. The memories make her smile instead of hurting like hell. I'm glad she's moving on, or as glad as I can be. My ultimate wish was that she be happy. I'm thinking now I should simply say goodbye and that it's in both of our interests to move on, cease all communication with her, and drift off into her past before I take that final step. I still worry about how she will react when she hears, but I'm less concerned about that than I have been.