it's only fair that i post this... all i ask is that people realize that i do recognize it as a good thing, but it doesn't take away the pain i feel. Respect that..ok? today i was asked to meet with the president of my university... privately. I was presented with a bursary meant to encourage students who are struggling to stay in school.... and those who are struggling generally. The award is in memory of a former student who committed suicide a couple of years ago. He said it was meant to let the recipient know that they mattered. There was a note that said "believe in yourself" and there was cash enclosed. i cried in my car on the way home. i feel touched... but i feel like i don't deserve this.