One problem after another

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Yvette, Sep 23, 2014.

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  1. Yvette

    Yvette Active Member

    I was fired today from my new job through no real fault of my own, just two days into working. I have been out of work for a year since graduating and I was relying on this to provide me with some purpose, experience and income, as every other opportunity had fallen through and all my other job hunting had been unsuccessful. I have lost all hope now, my life is just one problem after another. In the last month there has been a dramatic decline in my mental health; deep depression and anxiety and feeling suicidal which I guess has been building for a while and lately I am completely breaking down. I just want to give up and die, nothing ever works out for me and people constantly let me down. I have lost faith in humans and I've lost faith in myself. I just don't have the energy to fight anymore, all my efforts just seem in vain.

    Last week I had every reason to end my life, all my problems have been building up over time and it all seems insurmountable. Whilst this job opportunity came as an unwelcome stress during this particular period of depression, in another way it has been the thing getting me out of bed the last two days and out in the world, and now this is no more, I feel like a complete failure. I am embarrassed as I've told people I know that I got this job, and I feel I won't be able to get another job now as it was hard enough securing this one, and I am so depressed now I don't even know where to start with picking my life up. Long periods of time without real purpose in my life, and issues of low self esteem due to unfair way people have treated me is a big contributor to my depression and anxiety, and now I have to deal with all if this again! I just want to give up and die. I can't see any reason to continue. Life is too unfair.
     
  2. Yvette

    Yvette Active Member

    I am never good enough for anybody; I am sick of this. I'm just not designed for life. I am completely useless and worthless and no one in this world would care or notice if I was no longer here
     
  3. fosty

    fosty Well-Known Member

    sometimes we need to break down a little or even a lot in order to start rebuilding ourselves, and it doesn't mean death is our only option, it may mean what we have been trying to hold onto needs to be allowed to fall away so that a new way of life can emerge. wishing you all the love and happiness in the world cos you deserve it :)
     
  4. silentlyfading

    silentlyfading Well-Known Member

    You just spoke through my mind. Apart from me job part you described exactly how I feel. I'm sorry you're hurting I hope you find your way.
     
  5. Mozart

    Mozart Well-Known Member

    So sorry about what happened to you.
    It can help a lot to talk about one's misery with somebody else.
    You are not alone in this, please keep communicating here.Lots of people fight similar struggles.
    We are here to listen,anytime.
     
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