One Year's Work, bye bye/

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Wiccy, Mar 14, 2012.

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  1. Wiccy

    Wiccy Member

    I've been SH free for a year. I didn't even think about it. Then suddenly I broke. I don't know what I was even thinking. I was just so angry at everything around, and I was taking it out on my boyfriend. I felt so guilty that next thing I know I've locked myself in my bathroom and gave in.

    I feel sick, but I'm fascinated by it. That little voice in my head is telling me that I missed it, but I know its wrong.

    I was orginially addicted from age 15-17. Around my 18th birthday I've stopped completely, mostly when I finally got rid of all the negative things in my life. I was so proud of myself, and so was my boyfrined (Who was also my best friend that I met on here, in fact. We've known each other ever since I was 15)

    All that work and struggling for nothing. Part of me wants to scream, and part of me feels like a giant weight has been lifted off my shoulder. With Borderline Personality, I feel like the S.H is th eonly thing keeping me from harming other people. Its my only true dependent. I don't know why I stopped.
  2. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Then start to collect the days again by forgiving yourself, having an understanding of what you could not express and move are too precious to be hurt
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