Online dating...I need advice.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Bambi, Jan 5, 2010.

  1. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Not sure where to put this but I am thinking of dating again...not sure why, but the thought has crossed my mind and I didn't burst into tears so....
    Does anyone know if those online dating sites really work and if so know any good ones? I may chicken out but at least I am thinking about it which is a start after three years...
  2. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    I really don't know, but the internet is telling me good things about "" and "eHarmony".
  3. The_Guard

    The_Guard Well-Known Member

    my recomendation: save your money.

    go out, meet someone the old fashion way. it works better.
  4. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Old fashioned way? Like go to a bar? It is not easy to meet men in my line of work so am having a hard time just finding men...I get asked out by younger guys a lot but that is not my thing but if you have any ideas where to meet descent guys let me know.

    Thanks Fawkes for the info, I appreciate it.
  5. cult logic

    cult logic Staff Alumni

    Gay bars? =D

    I don't see what's wrong with using online sites.
  6. Stormhand

    Stormhand Well-Known Member

    I keep hearing to try out eharmony.
    but personally I don't trust online relationships
  7. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    I've gone on a few dates via craigslist personals. I met my current best friend that way. Also the personals are free, but it's up to you to filter out the creeps and scammers.
  8. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Thanks for all the replies everyone...I did a quick search on match and the men that want a woman my age look boring as hell and not very attractive either (sound shallow I know)
    Besides I honestly think it maybe too soon for me...I was hurt so bad and I know this must sound trivial and silly but it damn near killed me. We were supposed to get married and then ...well he ended it and I went into self-destruct mode and ended up here one night ready to end it all. It has been three years and the only time I allow myself to care anymore is around here, my heart in matters of romance is non-existent and there is a part of me that is dead, probably forever. Besides I don't think 43 year old brainiacs are high on the list of desirable women...a so I probably have no business dating anyone at all. Thanks to all of you here there is a small part of my heart that is not shut off and totally dead but even that I feel is slipping away to....I guess I know that it will be my time when that happens..
  9. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    Try it. Try on craigslist where you're more likely to find smart, older divorced men. Just post an ad being honest and see who responds, then start e-mail correspondence if you find someone. You might be pleasantly surprised - worst case scenario you're no worse off than now.
  10. shades

    shades Staff Alumni

    I know a few people that met and are still together after using "eharmony" and a couple that have had trouble finding someone at the same site.

    I think these dating sites are a better idea than hitting the bars though.
  11. salvarez83

    salvarez83 Member

    Try it's free and one of the best. However I yet to find a girlfriend. Still a good site though.
  12. salvarez83

    salvarez83 Member

    As for real life. Try

    What it is a site for people to make groups and meetup which each other. For example I belong to depression group, "shy" group, chess, movies and dinner group, board game group, video game group, etc.

    You just join whatever group you want, then wait for a event to show up and then you can participate. Most group meetups are free.

    Hope that help.
  13. silent_beast

    silent_beast Active Member

    It wouldn't hurt to try. It depends upon the effort that you put into dating online. There are many who find lasting relationships through online dating (of course, after sifting through the trash first, haha). If you plan to do it, try a site OKCupid. It's very organized and helps to match you with people.
  14. Stormhand

    Stormhand Well-Known Member

    Hey try it out, I mean if for the sake of just getting to know ppl may help you gain some trust.
  15. Zurkhardo

    Zurkhardo Well-Known Member

    Believe it or not, I actually found my girlfriend on OKCupid. She was a local girl that didn't live far and went to the same university. We've had a great relationship since.

    The trick is to cast your net wide. Don't neglect any oppurtunities to meet knew people. Sites, conferences, community service, events, and so on.
  16. Vagrant

    Vagrant Account Closed

    I think the best way it's going out, internet is full of trash..

    Going out like;

    sometime a friend of your cant present you a girl / boy / women / man.
  17. Bambi

    Bambi Well-Known Member

    Okcupid it is...I figure it is a step in the right direction and will give me practice at the very least.

    I am so afraid of getting burned and I always find the jerks that treat me like crap but maybe I will be fortunate and find a good one..I really love having someone to fuss over and love loving someone more than I love to be loved...
    Wish me luck and you guys will be the first to know if I get laid..
  18. aoeu

    aoeu Well-Known Member

    Yeah, only good people are present at clubs and bars. :rolleyes:

    I agree that a job or school are good places to meet people - if there are good people to meet there.

    On topic, though, I started setting up an account on OKCupid but I just don't have the energy to try and meet people anymore. :\
  19. Bubble

    Bubble Well-Known Member

    Many people before you have tried and failed at finding relationships in the real world, remember the internet hasnt really been around for that long especially not dating sites.

    Get a dog, go for a walk,
    hit the beach or shopping centres.
    Dont wait around at home/work expecting someone just to bump into you.
    Also standards. If you judge people by their looks you wont get very far. Never judge a book by its cover!