Online Ostracism

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Scum, Mar 23, 2010.

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  1. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

  2. Sammakko...

    Sammakko... Guest

    If groups want to keep me in that is only because they want to keep me as a general chew toy in the game. I am born to be ignored but it still hurts like to be a target of game also.
  3. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    :hug: if that's ok. If that's not ok, just ignore it.

    Feeling the way you do those must be a truly horrendous way to live. Whilst you may fele that way, and people have probably given you proof you should feel that way, you are worth more than that and deserve better than that- same as every single other person.

    I think people (in general, I have seen a good few people reach out to you) have accepted you here, but you haven't accepted us. Do you think maybe because you expect to be ignored or used in a game you see it even if its not there?

    I do hope that in the future you unostrasize (if that's a word) yourself from SF by coming back as a member.
  4. Sammakko...

    Sammakko... Guest

    Unfortunately I cannot response because my voice on this issue is cutted of.
  5. worlds edge

    worlds edge Well-Known Member

    I don't think 8 and 9 year olds should be allowed to spend enough time on-line to worry about being ostracized that way, personally. I wonder what the logic of including them in this study was?

    In general, I take it as axiomatic that people seek out people they'd like to spend time with, and ignore those with whom they'd rather not. Such is life. I don't think this enters the realm of bullying, rather its an acknowledgment on some level or other that your time is a limited resource and that you need to make decisions on how to spend it.

    Also, I can't see how this study reflects the reality of on-line games. At Yahoo! games or whatever there used to be dozens of rooms to choose from, so if you're ignored in one room, just move to another. Sooner or later you'll stumble across one you find a bit more friendly or amenable. But in this case it looked like the person being ostracized was stuck in the game, with no way out. So, I'm not sure precisely what is proven here, given these unrealistic constraints.

    My personal experience in this area is rather limited. I did go through a brief phase of playing Hearts on-line, and quite often found myself "booted" from rooms until I had played enough games so that others took me seriously. I never took it personally, since there was always another room forming, often even looking for players. And last year for about six months I got sucked into Ikariam, playing upwards of ten hours a day, until I quit cold turkey. But I'm not sure that's analogous to this study, since if you weren't an ally you had to expect attacks.

    Also, I kind of hate to bring this up, but some portion of the people who get "ostracized" or ignored in chat or on discussion boards, well, deserve it. As in, they flame, tell lies, and generally upset so many that they get ignored as an act of self-defense as much as anything else. And then start complaining about how they're being treated by others. On another discussion board I used to post on this exact situation arose when the Admin refused to ban a particular member. I'm not sure how common situations like this are, but they do happen. So there can be another side to this story.
  6. Sammakko...

    Sammakko... Guest

    You are just so wrong...
  7. TWF

    TWF Well-Known Member

    I can relate to this. It definetely has knocked my confidence and it has left me over-reacting a lot. It's only after I have a deep think I realise the two worlds aren't connected. But it can also have the opposite effect when you recieve attention and praise. I've had a bit of both, they do play a part in my morale.
  8. Avarice

    Avarice Well-Known Member

    It's an interesting study. I agree that with teenagers, they probably don't feel it as much because they may either be used to it from how they are treated in school, or just not care that much since it's just an on-line game and not really relevant to real life or who they are as a person. It's not like the person in the game even knows their name or how they look, so for some people it might be quite hard to take personally.

    However, it really depends on the 'type' of person. Everyone is different, and what may make one teenager burst into tears might make another just laugh and move on. Back in October of last year I had joined a forum mostly full of people aged between 30 - 40, who actually laughed and ridiculed me and my appearance behind my back whilst they thought I wasn't aware. Even though they were adults and not really my 'peers', I still felt extremely hurt and the effect of what they said has definitely dealt a long-lasting and permanent blow to my confidence. As a result, I PM'd the admin (who was actually involved in the incident and was the one who made the insulting comment about my appearance) who ignored my message and I eventually left the forum. Now, someone else probably would have just thought, "Jeez, what sad little people they are to slag off a teenager at their age.." and moved on, but being a sensitive person, it effected me quite badly. I guess the point here is, some teenagers will take ostracism worse than some eight to nine year olds. I don't think such a thing can be measured and result in a "who feels the worst effects", because personalities differ and everyone takes things differently.

  9. Sammakko...

    Sammakko... Guest

    Last edited: Mar 26, 2010
  10. Sammakko...

    Sammakko... Guest

    I never get tired to kissing x
  11. Mystic

    Mystic Well-Known Member

    I know all about Ostracism. I get enough here.
  12. Sammakko...

    Sammakko... Guest

    Sorry to hear that
    I have get enough in here too !!!!
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