only a week left to live

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by awb4130578, Feb 9, 2008.

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  1. awb4130578

    awb4130578 Member

    everything is soo fucked up.. i am 19 and a freshman in community college with shitty grades, 2 good jobs i love but i hate going to work, and i hate being home. next saturday my parents aren't gonna be home. i have rope but not enough. i will have to get more. all i need is that and be able to get into the woods that r by my house...<mod edit-gentlelady-methods>...ive been depressed since march 2007 and suicidal since september. what now?... should i tell my friends about this? how would i tell them?... i've been on soo many meds and none of them work. my doc doesn't know i want to hang myself. whatever i tell my docs they tell my parents...i would use a gun but i dont have one and rope is all i got. i got plenty of pills but i hate swallowing pills. i told one of my friends about what i am planning to do... hopefully, for everyone else, he will talk me out of it... i doubt he'll be able to though...i've been hospitalized 3 times 2 weeks each and that doesn't help either...
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 10, 2008
  2. The_Discarded

    The_Discarded Staff Alumni

    No, no, no, no. :sad:

    You don't top yourself, don't do anything. :hug:

    Five months of feeling suicidal is quite a long time, but you're not so far into it that you can't get better. You can get better. You can feel better. You can be better.

    What's going on to make you feel so bad? I doubt your grades are the result of your own inadequacies; your depression's gotten in the way of your performance, mayhaps.

    You hate going to work because you're depressed. But you have jobs you love? Focus on things you like. Focus on doing well in them.

    Don't focus on the thoughts.

    Don't tempt yourself with next weekend's potential.

    :hug: Breathe deep... you have friends, so you have people who give a damn... lean on them....
     
  3. gentlelady

    gentlelady Staff Alumni

    Please do not make any life altering decisions while you are deep in the throes of depression. Saying that you hope your friend talks you out of this shows a desire to live. As long as that is still present at any level, you need to do what you can to keep yourself safe. Talk to someone about your feelings and thoughts. Let them support you. Please take care and stay safe. :hug:
     
  4. dazzle11215

    dazzle11215 Staff Alumni

    don't do it.

    it can take some time to figure out how to treat depression, not everything works the same way for people. even though you've been in the hospital, that's mostly to keep you safe, it's not enough time to "fix" things. meds work differently for each person, there are others to try, or none if you choose.

    after you tell your friends, can you tell your therapist how badly you are feeling? help is definitely available to you and with love and support you can start to want to live again,

    catherine
     
  5. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    First of all, your doc cannot tell your parents anything at your age without your permission. If you tell him to keep it confidential, he HAS to, by law or risk losing his license. Tell him in confidence what you are thinking about and get the treatment you so desperately need and deserve.
     
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