It's been a month now that I have completely isolated myself. The only contact I have is online. I'm scared. I don't know exactly why I'm doing this to myself. I think part of it is because I don't feel like I am in control of my actions or even my thoughts anymore. I'm extremely stressed out. I just want to run away from this world. I always ruin things, even if I isolate myself, I seem to ruin something. I need help, but my body and mind won't let me get it. I can't do this anymore. I don't want anyone to reply to this, I'm just writing to write. I don't want this to seem like a cry for attention. I don't want to seem like the girl that is always suicidal, but it's my horrible reality. I am that girl.