Out of time

I am out of options, out of time. I cannot hold on anymore. I can't do it. It hurts too much and its just too hard. I don't know what to do, where to turn. I just want it over. I've been told I won't end it, that I'm too scared, and I honestly can't help them for thinking that. I've relapsed so many times, been here so many times and never done anything fatal. But I have never felt quite this bad. I can't even describe what it feels like. I really don't know what the heck I'm doing here, alive. Dead would benefit so many people. I need to be gone. for everyone's sake. I don't even know what I'm doing here. Rambling, making no sense, giving up I guess. Sorry for wasting everyone's time

 

Hi Kezzie
sorry you are feeling so bad do you have anyone you can talk to or maybe call or e mail a crisis line
i hope things get better for you

 

Your not wasting our time hun i hope you continue to talk to us let out some of the confusion and pain hugs

 

Hi Kezzie, Im so sorry that you are feeling like that. I feel that way more often than I dont. I've not been using this forum for long but I think it may be saving my life. There are so many people here that feel like us and want to die. But the fact is they are still here to talk about things. They might be having a horrible time but they are alive and holding on. Depression doesn't have to be a terminal illness. It might be a horrible cliche but where there is life there is hope. Things can change. It might be hard to believe that when you are at your lowest but start fighting and stay alive. Can you post again to let us know that you are ok.