over...it will be soon

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by lost_child, Jan 22, 2009.

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  1. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    Still here, went AnE spent hours there had to go on obs ward with drip :( ~ they agreed to let me go home but with the crisis team involved and spending hours at my house.

    not pleased that I'm still alive, and still want to die, I can't change the thoughts.
     
  2. Don't Follow

    Don't Follow Member

    Can I ask you for some details?
     
  3. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I'm so happy to hear that you're still alive Jody. :hug: Please don't try to overdose again hun. Eat healthy foods, drink lots of water and get some sleep hun. :hug:
     
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Don't give up Jodie.

    btw, I replied to your PM :hug:
     
  5. mystereo2099

    mystereo2099 Well-Known Member

    Another person... pills don't work. Unless you could get a bunch of rare exotic shit that average ppl couldn't even get a hold of and don't even know about.

    my point - pills don't work.

    glad to hear you're alright - take it one day at a time. One minute, one second.
     
  6. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Yup... pills DO NOT WORK...
    in fact pills usally used to get attention...
    so now that you had your attention what are so sad about?
     
  7. Ignored

    Ignored Staff Alumni

    Summer Rain that is a bloody stupid and insensitive thing to say, and also untrue! Look at the statistics... people DO die from overdoses in their thousands, and is not just done for attention but by people who are desperate for their pain to stop.
     
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    :agreed:
     
  9. Summer.Rain

    Summer.Rain Well-Known Member

    Sorry i shouldnt of say that
    its just that i feel like shit...
     
  10. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    this is upsetting me.. you know i care about you. i don't know how to help cos everything i suggest you don;t want to do. you got to help yourself here to live.. an fight it. taking all of these pills is damaging your body and you are likely to end up in pain and with a permanent damaged liver. you are not taking the right ones or enough to kill you, you are just going to cause a permanent disability... i am disabled and it is not fun trust me
    liver damage... that is a painful way to live. the help is there.. you have to want to take it.
    i have spoken to my cousin who is v high up in social services and worked in your area and she has offered to help you access what you need but you have to want that help. its very hard for me to watch someone destroy themselves when there is help out there. and no that doesn't mean i am giving up on you but i wish you would try to help you instead of self destructing. there is a life out there if you want it and there is an end to the pain. but you have to want it

    sam x
     
  11. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hello Lost Child,
    I have been reading yoiur posts for months and understand that you are in alot of pain. I haven't said anything because I didn't feel I had the right words to say to you.
    You are not worthless there are alot of people reaching out to you to offer support and I agree with Soliloquise that you have to want the help. The offer has been put in front of you to get that help but you need to reach out and grab ahold of it. No one can do that for you.
    It really pains me to know you are suffering so intensely. It makes my problems seem so insignificant. I wish you would climb out of that hole you dug for yourself to hide in. There is a whole life out there for you and you don't see it. You deserve to be loved and cared about just like everyone else.
    Please take the offer and take that first step! The pain you are in you have to let go of it. It isn't doing you anygood to hang on to it. Why would you want to let what happened to you control you that way. Myself I would be pissed off and be fighting and scratching to move forward in my life. Wait a minute I am fighting and scratching to move forward. If I can then I know you can also. Give it a try, what do you have to loose except the misery you are already in. Stay Safe!!~Joseph~
     
  12. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    If Pills didn't work then i wouldn't have a dead uncle or a dead friend so YES they do work.

    I have been told that the amount i'm takin won't kill be in an instant, but that if I continue I will go into liver failure I do keep trying to reach out to the crisis team, I just don't know what to say, i feel like a failure that everytime I feel down, angry, low, depressed, unattached that I take tablets. I know that although I'm not "committing suicide" in a full blown way, what i'm doing will end my life "accidently"..

    I won't go into hospital, I can't stay locked up in a hospital with men and women I just can't do that, its not safe. I need someone to understand me, someone to be able to help me speak when I find it difficult, or just to be there. I don't know what else to do....

    Yes, I've dug myself in a whole, i turned the self destruct button on and I can't find anyway to switch it off..I will only talk to 3 of the CRHT, anyone else I automatically go on the defence and "charlie" takes over. sorry. this won't make any sense. sorry
     
  13. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    you can switch it off by deciding to take charge and accept help and not stop til you get it. the choice may otherwise be taken out of your hands and that is a very real possibility at the moment. you need to weigh that up.
     
  14. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    I do want the help its just difficult to accept or to even know why people want to help when for the last 29yrs nobody has. I don't want to be sectioned. I don't want to.
     
  15. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    I'm just curious lost child, but is 'charlie' a multiple personality? :unsure:
     
  16. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    Yeah, sorry.
     
  17. Stranger1

    Stranger1 Forum Buddy & Antiquities Friend

    Hey Lost Child,
    Just wanted to tell you I am still thinking about you. I hate that your in so much distress. I wish I was there to give you that hug that you need. You are well cared for here at the forum and no one is giving up on you!!! Your problems have touched alot of us!! Keep thinking about getting that help, it will give you something to help distract those thoughts. Take Care!!~Joseph~
     
  18. soliloquise

    soliloquise Well-Known Member

    be brave and accept the help... cos if you do keep od-ing there will come a point where your choice is taken away. right now you have those choices still and you are in charge of your life so use it please... go for every scrap of help you can get, grab it with both hands... you can do it x
     
  19. Dave_N

    Dave_N Guest

    You have nothing to be sorry about Jody. It's ok if you have an additional personality. :hug:
     
  20. Starlite

    Starlite Senior Member


    Hi Jody

    Please don't apologize for having alters hun. I know where you are coming from in that aspect of your life.

    Have you tried writing down what you are feeling and showing it to your team? Sometimes writing down things can create a better outlet for you to let others know the "real you" on the inside.

    I know you have had some horrible things happen to you in your life for you to reach the point where you are. I am sure it feels like a repeating movie each and every day. Wouldn't it be great if we had a delete button we could push to erase all those bad memories of those horrible things? However, we aren't equipped with that, so what do we do? What can you do? First thing is first, you did nothing wrong , so please don't punish yourself, you have been punished enough. Then, get out your feelings in a productive way: (suggestions only) rip paper, punch a pillow, write down your feelings every day and share it with someone else that you trust.


    If you ever need to talk, please pm me or you can add me to messenger if you have it.... Karren05@live.com

    I wish you peace Jody!
     
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